DISCLAIMER: Many of the characters in here are property of Disney, Warner
Bros. and other animation-type studios. The Roger Rabbit franchise
specifically belongs to Touchstone Pictures while the characters were created
by Gary K. Wolf. I'm just using the characters in an incredibly perverted way
and don't intend to do any of that copyright infringement stuff. I'm just a
poor, filthy-minded bastard who really can't afford to be sued!
FEATURING: Ariel, Poison Ivy & Batgirl (Batman: TAS)
RATING/PAIRING: NC 17, MF, MFF, toon, oral
FEEDBACK: Appreciated. In fact, if anyone has any suggestions for future
stories then I'd be more than happy to consider them - it saves me thinking
about what I want to do to these characters...
Who Framed Rgoger Rabit: Intern In Toon Town Part 3 - The Replacements
by ValleyBoy69 ([email protected])
It was three in the morning when I got the call from Mr. Maroon at the
studio. The phone must've been ringing for a few minutes at least because he
didn't sound too happy when I finally answered. "Yeah?" I asked drowsily.
"Tim," Maroon growled, trying to keep his frustration to a minimum. "I hate
to call you at this time." He was lying. I knew that much at least. "But I
need you to get down to the Red Lion Tavern near your apartment."
"What?" I asked, thinking that I must have missed some. "Sir," I added
"That damned fool drunk Eric is down there making a fool out of himself there
and you're the closest we've got."
"Eric?" I asked, not entirely sure who he meant. I was already out of bed,
though, the wireless phone propped between my head and my shoulder as I
struggled to pull my pants on. "Who the hell's Eric?"
"You know, the prince," Maroon said, clearly exasperated that I wasn't one
hundred per cent with it. "Ariel's husband!"
I sighed. I'd seen them two weeks earlier at the Toonies awards ceremony.
I'd noticed that he wasn't being very sociable but in retrospect, he had been
cradling that bottle of beer pretty close. As the night progressed he must
have worked his way through several bottles of champagne. Ariel was doing her
best pretending not to notice and, to be honest, I guess it didn't really hit
home for me. Not really much of a surprise considering it wasn't long after
that I was being dragged into the bathroom, handcuffed to the cistern and
having my brains fucked out by my date. My date being Belle. Man, who'd have
thought she would be so damn kinky?
"What do you want me to do exactly?" I asked. "This isn't exactly in my job
"Saving this studio is your job description. It's the job description of
every son of a bitch who works for me. That's exactly what this is and you're
the nearest son of a bitch. Get over there and get him home before the press
arrives," Maroon insisted, polite as ever. "He's supposed to be working on
the new sequel but if it leaks that he's acting up do you have any idea how
much trouble my ass is going to be in?"
"Lots..." I offered cautiously.
"Damn straight, lots! Now get down there!" he shouted before abruptly hanging
up on me.
I threw the phone onto my bed and pulled a t-shirt on over my head. It smelt
like it hadn't been washed in a week. I didn't think it had been. I yawned
and headed out of the apartment block and onto the street. A few bars were
still open, catering mainly to alcoholics and students with too much money.
I'd never actually been to the Red Lion before. I spent most of my time on
the other side of the tunnel leading to Toon Town where I drank with Mario,
Bender and Mickey Mouse in the Crazy Horse. It seemed to me that they were
far better company than real flesh and blood types, but I guess that's just
the kind of guy I am.
Surprisingly, the bar was still packed when I got there and waded through the
mass of people in my way. I just couldn't figure it out. I'd been in bed for
nearly two hours and here were people still out on the town. Didn't they have
any jobs? I flashed my ID at the gargantuan human bouncer who nodded me in
without saying a word.
Finding my "target" wasn't exactly hard. Prince Eric stood out as much in
this place as I did in the Crazy Horse. I navigated my way around the
hollering frat boys and headed towards the sloshed-looking Toon sat in the
corner. I actually doubted Maroon's concern about the press. Nearly everyone
else in here seemed far too drunk to even notice Eric. I sat down next to
him just as he finished taking a huge swig from a bottle of what looked to
be a fairly generic beer.
"How you doing there, buddy?" I asked, trying to get some hints on the
situation. I couldn't exactly drag him out without causing a scene.
"M'fine," Eric slurred as he tried to take another gulp of beer only to find
"A Toon in a human bar, though," I said. "Don't see that very often. I'm Tim,
by the way." I offered him my hand which, on his third attempt, he managed to
grasp and shake.
"I like th' atmosphere," he replied before calling out for another drink. In
all the noise, no one seemed to notice.
"Hey, don't I know you?" I asked. "You're that guy from that film."
"Yeah, I was," he said, his shoulders slumping in that oddly comical way that
only Toons can manage. "Mister One Hit Wonder. Then what? Stuck with a wife
who only fell in love with my character, churning out straight to video
movies once every half decade." He waved his hands around in an amusingly
sarcastic way. "Whoopee. I'm so wonderful." He started to work his way around
the fifteen or so empty bottles on the table, shaking each of them carefully
in the hopes of finding a drop left in at least one of them. It really was
kinda pathetic. "At least Charming got three big movies before, you know,
before it happened."
"Before what happened?" I asked. I knew I should have been trying to get him
out of there but he was about to offer some gossip on one of Toon Town's
biggest mysteries - the disappearance of Price Charming back in the early
sixties. I know, I know. I can't help it. I'm such a woman.
"Those bitches did him in," Eric whispered conspiratorially. I figured he
was referring to Cinderella and Aurora. Charming had been married to both of
them, at the same time it later turned out. It was only made public when he
tried to get back together with his first onscreen love, Snow White. The
press caught them together and suddenly everything spilled out. His career
was finished, but it eventually turned out Cinderella and Aurora had both
been aware of each other's relationship with their husband, and were, in
fact, having an affair of their very own. Needless to say, in the more
innocent days of 1962, that was a huge scandal that shook both Toon and
Charming, it seemed, threatened to go public with the story which would have
ruined the lives of both of his wives. He mysteriously vanished before he got
the chance to. It was quickly hushed up by authorities on both sides of the
Hollywood-Toon Town divide. The official story was that they paid him off and
he left to live on an island somewhere. There are, of course, conspiracies
that were more in tune with the version of events that Eric was drunkenly
hinting at. Nothing new, of course. It's right up there with who assassinated
Kennedy and the whether or not Horace Horsecollar was actually the first Toon
to step foot on the moon.
Eric had shaken the last of the empty bottles and not found anything. He
stopped his story right away, as if he'd totally forgotten what he was
talking about. "Could you be a real fella and get me another drink?" Eric
slurred. "I'm a prince, you know."
"You know, buddy," I said. "I think maybe you ought to think about heading
home. It's late and if you have any more you may regret it."
"You're not telling me how much I can..." Eric began, his animated finger
poking me in the face. I guess he just wanted to point aggressively but in
his condition the accuracy didn't quite match the intent. I swatted his hand
away and hooked his arm around my shoulder. I pulled him to his feet, feeling
grateful that most Toons are lighter than humans for some reason (unless, of
course, it's funnier for them not to be, in which case they can weigh an
absolute ton). Toon physics are a wonderful thing, and I tried reading some
grad student's thesis on it once, but I've never been one to understand
Eric didn't seem to want to put up a fight as I led him out of the Red Lion.
His head dropped down and his feet scraped across the ground. I got out and
hailed a cab. A regular, black human taxi pulled up. The Middle Eastern
driver looked a little surprised as I loaded the Toon prince into the back
of his car.
I hoped I could just leave Eric there and leave his being able to direct the
cab back to his home up to chance. Then I wondered whether or not Toons could
choke on their own vomit. It certainly looked like he was minutes away from
blowing chunks. I sighed and got in the back next to him. Maroon would kill
me if I just left him to it. "Toon Town, please," I said and we pulled off.
It took a good twenty minutes to get a coherent address out of Eric but we
eventually got to the impressive-looking mansion where he lived with Ariel.
I paid the cabbie and hoped that Maroon would comp me the fare when I
confronted him the next day. God, is this what all interns have to do? Even
on the human side of Hollywood?
I helped Eric out of the car and up the steps to the door. I pressed the bell
and hoped to God that someone would answer. I had to be in work in four hours
and I was going to end up feeling like shit as it was. For now, however, the
adrenalin was keeping me surprisingly awake. I figured it wouldn't last.
I rang the doorbell a few more time before a figure appeared behind the
frosted glass. The door opened and I was confronted with the most astonishing
sight I'd seen since... well, since I saw Belle in skin tight leather several
Ariel stood on the other side of the door, clad in transparent pink negligee.
I could see her tiny pink nipples through it and my until-this-point tired
cock leapt back into life. I stopped my eyes moving down as she began
shouting at her husband.
"I can't believe you'd do this to me!" she exclaimed. "I've been worried
sick! You could've got yourself killed."
"M'a Toon," he said, attempting to form words. "Can't die. Anyways, you
wouldn't care anyway." He fell forward. I must've felt more confident in his
ability to stand and let go of him while I'd been staring at his wife's perky
little tits. Ariel stepped back and Eric hit his head on the marble-tiled
floor of their entrance hall. He didn't move. I was worried for a moment
that, despite what we're told to believe, that maybe he was dead. Then he
burped, exhaling a trio of bubbles then started snoring. I felt a little
"Um... Hi," I began, looking at Ariel expectantly. "I'm Tim."
"I know who you are," Ariel sighed. "I saw you at the Toonies. Now, come on.
Help me get him inside."
I lifted Eric up over the threshold where Ariel directed me to the living
room where we deposited him on the sofa. After a few moments, she sighed
again. "I'm so sorry about this," she began. "I'm guessing Maroon sent you."
"I was the closest son of a bitch," I said, repeating my boss's words. She
eyed me up curiously, trying to understand what I'd meant. "Private joke," I
My eyes kept drifting away from hers. Believe me, this is a difficult thing
to do. One look at any Toon girl and you could spend the rest of your life
just staring into those large, expressive eyes. On the other hand, they
generally don't wear see-through nightwear like this. It goes without saying
that most Toons work on kids TV shows and movies, so you don't get to see
them looking so... raw.
"But it's such a coincidence," Ariel said, a smile finally coming over her
weary face. "You, the guy who... helped out Jasmine and Belle the way you
I really hadn't thought of that. Here I was, in the home of another member
of the infamous Princess Clique who dictated the fashions and views of many
people in Toon Town and beyond. In the space of my first two weeks at MDW
Studios I had already had a one night stand with Jasmine and fucked Belle
in the bathroom of a theatre during the Toon Town Academy Awards. And right
now, Ariel was giving me the eye. It's funny. Back in her first movie she
played a 16 year old but, despite having made a sequel in which her character
had a daughter, there was no doubt that she still looked like a teenager.
Just the way she was drawn, as Kim Possible told me just before I found my
dick deep inside her.
"You want to know why I'm so annoyed at that loser?" she asked me, making a
point of not even looking in Eric's direction as he slept drunkenly on the
plush couch. "Tonight was our anniversary. Even after all this time, I still
try to make an effort. I even got all dressed up ready for him to unwrap."
She span around, giving me a good view of the negligee she wore. She almost
seemed to move in slow motion, her bright red hair whirling around gracefully
until she came to a stop. Seemingly a little dizzy after her effort, she
staggered forward into my arms and smiled sweetly. "Do you want to unwrap me
I didn't even need to answer. If I wasn't going to be getting any sleep
tonight, it better be for a good cause.
I leaned in towards Ariel, meeting her lips halfway as we began to kiss,
tenderly at first but as soon as our tongues met it quickly devolved a
passionate frenzy. Her hands were all over me, pulling at my clothes as
though she were just trying to rip them off my body. For my part, I was
working my way towards her ass, rubbing my hands down her back until I
reached my destination.
Ariel moaned quietly as I began to kiss my way up and down her neck,
nibbling lightly on her earlobes. My hands lifted up the sheer material of
her nightdress as I massaged her ass cheeks.
Her hands, in turn, began to creep down the back of my pants. She gave me a
quick grope and, I swear to God, I think I yelped a little.
I stopped for a moment and looked into her eyes. I really do have a thing
for Toon girls but there was something about Ariel. I'd watched The Little
Mermaid with my mom and younger sister Melissa. The brat had wanted to go
even though I figured she was far too young and would just whine all the
way through like any two year old would at their first ever movie. And
anyway, I wanted to see something with a bit more action. But the first
time Ariel appeared on screen I was blown away. Looking back, I think she
may have been my first crush. So what was happening right now didn't feel
like making out with a celebrity as it had with Jasmine and Belle (and
even Kim for that matter).
Looking over at her snoring husband, I stopped my advances. "If we're going
to do this, shouldn't we, y'know, head to the bedroom." I didn't even think
about stopping this. Hell no. Maybe that makes me an asshole. I prefer to
think it would be better described as "morally ambiguous."
"Forget it," Ariel said. "If he wakes does it even look like he'd notice
That was all I needed. I grabbed her by her tiny waist, and kissed her again.
With a free hand, I slid her nightdress off her shoulders, one strap at a
time. It fell silently to the floor, leaving Ariel, the Little Mermaid
herself (although the tail was actually drawn on in post production, I'd
heard), totally naked before me.
She smiled coquettishly, several bunches of hair covering her small breasts
but leaving nothing else to the imagination. She had a small red triangle of
pubic hair just above her slit that looked at though it'd be so smooth to the
She said nothing more. Instead, she reached forward, pulling my shirt off
over my head. I'm not well-build, or even toned, by any stretch of the
imagination but for am ordinary guy I guess I can't be that bad. Ariel, at
least, seemed to be impressed. She began tugging at my jeans, desperately
trying to unzip them. After a little struggled, she succeeded. She guided
them down to my ankles, getting onto her knees as she did so. I stepped out
of them and she threw them aside. They landed unceremoniously on Eric's
Ariel grasped at my boxers, pulling them down just enough for my cock to slip
out, hitting her in the face. In her excitement she'd gotten a little too
close. Still, it didn't delay matters too much. She grasped my shaft with her
small, cartoon hands and began to jerk me off slowly.
"I've never been with a human man before," she said, not taking her eyes off
my cock. "But I heard you all feel so much better than any Toon guy."
"I could say the same about Toon girls," I gasped as she opened her mouth and
proceeded to engulf me with it. I've said it before and I'll say it again,
there's nothing quite like the feeling of having a hot Toon girl giving you
head. Before too long it became clear she was quite inexperienced. I figured
Eric really was more interested in complaining about his lot in life when he
could have been getting this kind of treatment from his hot wife.
All it took was a few moans at the appropriate times for Ariel to figure out
exactly what she was supposed to be doing. Her head bobbed up and down my
length, stopping only to let her tongue massage the head. She looked so damn
sexy as she licked all the way up my shaft before taking my cock right back
into her mouth again.
I could've spent so long there as the gorgeous Toon on her knees sucked me
off, but I figured I ought to do something for her. It was, after all, her
anniversary. As she pulled herself off my cock, her chin was coated in saliva
and most likely a little precum too.
"Lie down," I said quietly. She quickly obeyed. I kissed her again, just
enough to let our lips touch and make her reach forward for more as a pulled
away and began to kiss my way down her body. My left hand began to caress her
breasts one by one, while I used my right to stroke her inner thigh. She
gasped as I got closer to her pussy.
I made sure I took a long time before my face reached it. I left a trail of
kisses all the way down her stomach until I got where I wanted to be. Her
clit was already enflamed and sticking out from between her lips. A small
slither of juices dripped from between them. I leaned forward and licked it
up, taking my tongue in one long stroke all the way up her gash causing
Ariel to moan so load I was worried it may even wake Eric up. Thankfully,
it didn't, and I began lapping at her pussy with even more vigour. I flicked
my tongue as fast as I could over her clit, her hips bucking with every
stroke. "Aaaaaaaahhhh... Mmmmmmm... Ooooooooohhh..." she groaned. "That's
the spot. Lick me there. Aaaaahhhhh! This feels so good!"
Ariel's hands grabbed the side of my head and forced my face right into her
pussy. I could smell her juices and it just drove me even wilder. She wrapped
her legs around my shoulder, continuing grinding her groin into my face.
Lowering my head a little, I ran my tongue in little circles around the
entrance to her pussy. The young princess continued to gyrate into me. She
seemed to be getting closer to the edge. I could feel her stomach tense as I
pushed the tip of my tongue into her pussy itself.
Licking all the way back up, I replaced my tongue with one finger, then two.
They got in a lot deeper, after all. She was still pretty tight and it only
took another minute of licking and finger-fucking to finally bring her over
the edge. She yanked at my hair as she climaxed, pulling me back up to face
level. She kissed me passionately, seeming to enjoy the taste of herself that
covered my face.
"Fuck me," she gasped.
I was ready to oblige, preparing my cock to enter her when we heard a loud
crash. I looked up to see Eric had fallen to the floor. "Whazzat?" he asked,
confused as he reached drunkenly for my pants which were still tangled up in
"Damn!" Ariel exclaimed, pushing me off her and yanking my jeans from under
her husband. She threw them at me. "Get them on!"
"But..." I started but there was no way anything could happen now the drunken
bastard had spoiled the mood. I grabbed my boxers and t-shirt and ran out
into the hallway as Eric sat up, rubbing his head and looking around the
impressive living room with a confused expression on his face.
"Muss've heard summing," he slurred.
My clothes were on, my hard-on still raging when Ariel came out to me several
minutes later. She had pulled the nightdress on again but I noticed the
material around her crotch was soaking wet. Her legs were still a little
uneasy too which made me feel a little better. At least I'd been able to
"I really should take him to bed," Ariel sighed.
"And I should go..." I said, more than a little depressed at the prospect.
She led me to the door and opened it up. As I was turning to head down the
steps she grabbed my arm. I moved back into her, my body pressing tight
against hers and kissed the beautiful Toon woman again. "We'll finish this,"
she whispered into my ear.
I heard the clatter of ornaments hitting the floor as Eric began to stumble
out of the living room towards the stairs up to the bedroom that he shared
with Ariel. Lucky bastard.
She closed the front door quickly, leaving me on the street. I noticed in the
distance the sun was starting to come up. He looked kinda sleepy, his huge
yellow face yawning as he got ready to perform his daily duties.
"Hey, buddy," I called out to him. "Got the time?"
The sun suddenly sprouted an arm with a watch attached to it. "Five thirty.
Looks like someone's doing the walk of shame, huh?"
"Tell me about it," I replied as I walked towards a public phone box to call
a cab back home.
* * *
I didn't hear my alarm going off an hour and a half later. After arguing
with a phone box, I eventually got a taxi which decided to have an extended
conversation with me as we headed back to my side of the Toon Town Tunnel and
ended up taking several wrong turns. I eventually got back to my apartment at
six thirty and was sure all I needed was to rest my eyes for a half an hour
before I had to get ready for work.
Staggering into Mr. Maroon's office two hours late, my head was still
spinning, thinking about what had happened with Ariel. Unbelievable. Man, I
loved Toons. I didn't even care what Maroon had to say to me.
I noticed that he was taking to someone whose shape was completely engulfed
by the back of the chair. I quickly recognised the voice. Droopy.
Maroon saw me and smiled. He didn't even seem to react to the fact I hadn't
got there at eight as I usually did. "Ah, Tim. This is Constable Droopy."
The depressed-looking dog turned around in his chair. He was wearing a police
uniform. I'd heard a lot of Toons went into different jobs when their acting
careers dried up. Yosemite Sam went on to become mayor of Toon Town but still
occasionally came back to do the occasional movie. The same couldn't be said
of human actors like Schwarzenegger. I remember seeing a photo of a meeting
they had once at a California Republican rally. Sam was trying to convince
the Governator that he shouldn't have to have a licence at all for his
weapons since they were only animated. Most Republicans agreed. One of the
few times they ever did, thanks to the control of the Religious Right over
the party. I still remember when Jerry Falwell blamed the terrorist attacks
back in 2001 on "the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the
gays and the lesbians, and the Toons." Conservatives have always looked at
Toons as having no morals and being a bad influence on kids. More than a few
good Toons lost their jobs during the witch hunts of the 1950s when they were
blamed for juvenile delinquency.
Droopy finally spoke in his slow, drawn-out voice. "Hello, sir," he said.
"Uh... hi," I replied. I wasn't sure exactly why he was here.
"The Constable here is talking to me about the protests that we've been
hearing rumours about for the last week," Maroon began.
"That's right, sir," Droopy said, looking at me.
"Apparently more than just the Batman crowd are getting involved but they're
stirring up something pretty big. Could be bad for business," Maroon informed
me. "We're discussing options of how to stop it happening."
"Exactly, sir," Droopy continued. "Is there anything you can do to help,
"Me?" I asked, confused. Personally, I was all in favour of the protests. If
they got enough Toons together they may even start a full-blown strike that
would force the studio to accede to their demands. The actors from the
nineties cartoon had been kicked out of their jobs when the studio decided
it wanted a new Batman show with an entirely new cast. While Batman found
employment on the Justice League spin-off, nearly all the other stars were
unemployed. It was something that was happening far too much these days. The
entire cast of the original Master of the Universe were not even told that a
remake was in the works, the Ninja Turtles turned up for the first day on
their new show only to be told April was being recast. They walked out and
were, in turn, replaced too. This was, in my mind, part of the problem in
Toon Town today. Unemployment was rife. Sure, they could get work elsewhere
but some found it degrading. "Why me?" I continued.
"Well, you know Toons," Maroon began. "You know, *know* Toons."
"I have no idea what you're talking about, sir," I told him.
"C'mon, Tim!" my boss sighed. "You're getting quite a reputation in these
parts, among the female Toons. And it just so happens that the troublemakers
organising this are Batgirl and Poison Ivy."
"So what you're saying is..."
"Go over there, talk with them, use your charms and get them to change their
"Charms?" I exclaimed. "I'm sorry, sir, but this won't work. I'm not very
diplomatic and anything you seem to think has happened involving me these
past few weeks... it was all totally out of my control." I decided not to
add that I actually supported the Toon's actions.
"Well, I know you're not very good at talking. That's not what we want. We've
tried talking. It's going ahead tomorrow and you're..."
"...the last resort of a desperate studio?" I offered.
"Exactly," Maroon said, either not noticing or intentionally ignoring my
"And what do you have to say about this... officer?" I asked, turning my
attention to Droopy who was, all things considered, the least convincing cop
I'd ever seen.
"I think we should stop this, sir," he replied.
I wanted to ask why he wasn't supporting his fellow Toons, but Droopy was the
kind of dog to stay loyal to the position he was in and do his best at it. As
passive as he was, he seemed to be loyal to the uniform. Damn. Maroon stared
at me, making it clear that I had no choice in the matter. Personal view, be
damned, apparently. I sighed. "What do you want me to do?"
* * *
The protestors had rented some office space near the studio in order to have
a base of operations to plan protests out. As I walked to the door I got some
unpleasant stares from those who were hanging around outside. As I made my
way in, I was astonished to see Bugs Bunny walking out, pushing passed me.
"Watch where you're goin', Doc," he said, grimacing at the fact I was human.
It was nice to see the older Toons who didn't even need to try to get work
supporting these efforts. I wished I could just tell them that I was on their
side. I sighed and walked in.
"Can I help you?"
I turned to see the wide green face of Raphael staring at me. It seemed the
Turtles had offered to work security. At least I thought they were security.
"I'm here to talk to Ivy and, uh, Batgirl," I replied.
"Let me guess, you're from the studio?" the large Toon turtle growled.
"Yes," I said, puffing out my chest to at least try and look authoritative.
"I think I've got an appointment." I honestly wasn't sure. Had Maroon called
ahead and said I was coming? Or were they just throwing me into the lion's
den - or was that "turtle's den"? - to see how I would come out? They
probably figured I'd get turfed out onto the street before I got anywhere
near. Maroon really was desperate.
"Go on up," Raphael said after a few moments.
I was impressed at the volunteer efforts going on here. As I headed to the
stairs, I noticed several Toons, both those out of work or being threatened
with unemployment and even ones who didn't need to be here. I was watching
good old fashioned grassroots union work in action. It was amazing. I was
nearly knocked off my feet by Porky Pig, who came running by with a stack of
papers. He dodged to the side and they went everything.
"I-I-I-I-I'm real sorry," he stammered as he tried to pick them up. I bent
over to help but got a blank stare. My God, even the friendly Toons suddenly
hated me just because I was made of flesh and blood. I'd never felt out of
place around Toons in my entire life!
As Pork hobbled off, he dropped another few leaflets. I picked one up and
stared at it. "TOONS UNITE!" it read
SUPPORT YOUR FELLOW TOONS!
JOIN THE MILLION-TOON-MARCH
AT MAROON STUDIOS LOT
CUSTARD PIES PROVIDED!"
Well, I thought, what's a good Toon event without custard pies? I figured
they weren't going to get close to a million Toons at the protest but even
a few hundred would be able to make their presence known and ensure the
studio stood up and paid attention. Good for them. Except, I'd been sent
here to talk them out of it.
"Can we help?" a cold voice asked. "Or are you trying to stop this protest
by crumpling up one flyer at a time?"
I looked up from the leaflet to see Poison Ivy standing in front of me,
dressed in her traditional outfit of green leaf swimsuit, or whatever the
hell that was. After seeing Toons wearing whatever they wanted when off
duty, I was a little surprised to see her like that. Then I realised that
this was the whole point. This was her outfit. Why should she give it up
just because the studio was trying to replace her?
"Well, answer me. The studio sent you, didn't they?"
"Uh, no," I answered. "I mean, yes."
"Which is it?" She raised one eyebrow while one side of her mouth dropped
into an event greater sign of disapproval.
"Yeah. I mean, the studio sent me..."
Another voice chimed in. "To do what exactly?" Batgirl asked as she stepped
into the doorway of the office she was sharing with Ivy. She, too, was
wearing her uniform from the Batman Animated show, her face covered with a
mask that didn't really hide her identity, but that wasn't the point.
Then it hit me. "Actually, I'm not altogether sure," I answered honestly.
Ivy and Batgirl stared at each other and shrugged. "I think I know," Ivy
said. "Just come in."
I obeyed and she closed the door behind me. The office was a lot larger
than it appeared from the outside, with about ten desks each covered with
paperwork and old fashioned Toon typewriters. On the back wall there was a
cork board with names of various Toons, divided into those who the organisers
knew were supporting them, those who were opposed and those that could go
either way. More than a few names in the columns surprised me.
"Wow. Batman is actually *against* the protest?" I said without thinking.
The looks on Ivy and Batgirl's face quickly told me that I was starting this
meeting by picking at an open wound.
"So much for loyalty, huh?" Batgirl sniffed indignantly. "Not exactly the
great hero he plays on TV."
No matter how Batgirl felt, Poison Ivy was right down to business. "Okay,
we know why you're here. Someone up there seems to think that just because
you've slept with two of those whores that you've got some kind of gift of
seduction when it comes to Toons." She laughed a little, just enough to dent
my manhood. "I mean, really. Maroon sent a little human guy like you to
seduce women like us? What was he thinking?"
"Desperate times, desperate measures," I offered meekly.
"He must be desperate. Or at least think we are," Ivy sniffed. "Just look at
how they're trying to make me look like a villain for organising this. And
yet they're the ones who created me to play a villain in a show they've axed
me from! Can you believe that?"
I just shook my head. I was out of my depth. I'd tried to warn Maroon I would
be, but would he listen? What did they think I was? I'm just some skinny
student from upstate New York. I've never been what you'd call a stud. I'd
just been lucky lately.
Now, if anyone wanted to seduce anyone it'd be these two sexy Toon girls in
front of me.
"So here you are. In our office the day before we take action. How much do
you think the studio would pay to get you back?"
"What?" I exclaimed.
"You're not serious!" Batgirl finally chimed in. "Come on, Ivy. We're not
Poison Ivy shook her head for a moment and that brief interlude appeared to
have subsided. "It's not my fault, Batsy," she offered. "I can't help but
have the occasional villainous instinct. It's the way they drew me." She
finally smiled at me for the first time. "But honestly, would they pay
I laughed out loud at that. Maroon? Pay to get me out? Hardly. He'd want
to Toons to turn the media against them by doing something like this. The
asshole. "I doubt that very much," I answered once I had stifled the
Batgirl stepped forward, placing her hand on Ivy's shoulder. "You know,
I'm taking your lack of issuing demands to mean that you're not entirely
comfortable with the studio's actions. Am I right?" She leaned forward,
her lips just inches away from mine. I could smell her sweet breath and
found myself leaping to attention.
"A little," I muttered. So was she about to do to me what I'd been sent here
to do to them? One thing to be said about it was that Batgirl was a lot
better at this whole seduction thing than I was.
"Let's see if we can make that ‘a lot,'" she whispered, her lips meeting mine
in such a way that I almost exploded there and then. Her tongue slid into my
mouth, making me jump a little. Still, with Ivy there and still apparently
mad at me, I wasn't exactly sure what I should be doing.
I let myself open one eye to see Poison Ivy slipping out of her green
leotard, just remaining in her gloves and boots. Apparently she had the same
idea. I couldn't keep my eyes off her slim animated body, her perky tits and
tiny light brown patch of hair between her legs as she walked slowly towards
Batgirl and me.
I felt her hands reach around my head, grasping my hair. She yanked me away
from Batgirl, who seemed with whimper mournfully, and planted a powerful kiss
on my lips. Dizziness began to overtake me. "Woagh," I gasped. "Do you really
have the whole kiss-that-kills like on the TV show?"
"You're about to find out," Ivy grinned, her fingers working their way under
my shirt and across my chest. She pinched one of my nipples and I yelped a
little, eliciting a laugh from both of them.
Ivy continued to move down my body, her hands exploring every inch of my
chest and stomach until they came to my pants. With slow, careful movements,
she began to unzip me. Her head jumped back a little as my cock sprang out,
almost hitting her in the face. "Yummy," she grinned. "Looks like it's not
just plants I can make grow."
"Oh, you," Batgirl said. She must have been rolling her eyes but I didn't
notice. She was behind me know, her arms draped around my chest as she
planted kisses on my neck. Just the feel of her Toon lips on my skin made
my cock twitch again in Ivy's face.
On her knees now, the villainess wrapped her gloved hand around my shaft and
began to pump it with slow, rhythmic movements. I closed my eyes and breathed
deeply as she began to envelope it with her mouth, her tongue flickering over
I felt Batgirl's hands move down my body and grab the base of my cock.
She started to work it up and down as Ivy continued to suck lightly on it.
Despite wanting to keep Batgirl's body close to mine, I started reach behind
myself, between the two of us and began to fumble to release her utility
belt. After about a minute of failed attempts, Batgirl signed and used her
free hand to loosen it, the other still working my cock, feeding it into
With the belt off, I began to tug at her pants, pulling them down with ease
to reveal a pair of black lacy panties. My eyes were still on Ivy slobbering
over my dick, pulling it from her mouth to lick up the shaft and all around
the tip before plunging it back in again. All the while, I was pushing my
hands between Batgirl's legs rubbing her pussy, her panties the only thing
between my fingers and her wetness. She gasped as I pushed the material aside
and slid two digits deep into her. I pumped into her for a while, using my
thumb to play with her clit until my arm started to ache in that position.
Sensing my discomfort, she pulled away, my fingers still dripping with her
juices. Moving to my front she pulled off her shift and hurled it across the
room, not noticing it land on top of a Toon typewriter that hurumphed and
pushed it to the floor with a quick thrust of its keys.
So there I was, with Poison Ivy on her knees sucking my cock and Batgirl,
dressed in nothing but her cowl and cape, boots and gloves standing in front
of me, her small red mound of hair glistening with the pussy juices I had
just enticed out of her. It was unbelievable, but here I was.
"Come here," Batgirl whispered to the two of us, as she swept a ton of
paperwork from an otherwise empty desk and sat up on, her legs spread, giving
me the perfect view of her sopping slit. Ivy knew exactly what she had in
mind and quickly did the same. It took me a few moments to get the picture, a
little distracted by the two gorgeous Toons in front of me with their legs
wide open and pussies on display.
Once my mind clicked into place I was on my knees in front of Batgirl, my
tongue brushing slowly up her pussy until I reached her clit. She gasped as
I flickered over it, making circles around it.
My other hand started to play with Ivy's pussy, pinching and massaging her
clit lightly as I continued to eat Batgirl out. The taste was sublime. I
thrust my tongue into her, while my fingers did the same to her friend. The
pace quickened until they were gasping for more. My face and hands, their
thighs, the table was soaking wet as I swapped over, my left hand entering
Batgirl, my mouth giving all its attention to Ivy. I looked up briefly to
see them kissing passionately, fondling each other's breasts.
But I had work to do. My tongue darted all over Ivy's pussy, around the lips,
drawing circles around her moist entrance and moving up and down and across
her clit as fast as I could make it go. She was started to buck her hips,
thrust herself closer to my mouth. My fingers began to fuck Batgirl even
faster, a third now engorged in her pussy.
They were going wild now, Ivy kissing Batgirl's breasts as she closed her
eyes and begged for more. More from me or Ivy I wasn't sure. Probably both.
She shuddered suddenly, the orgasm rippling through her body. As she laid
her head back, I removed my fingers and rammed them into Ivy, massaging
inside her pussy as I continued to suck lightly on her clit. She came not
"That was..." Batgirl said, still a little worse for wear.
Ivy, her mind still on the ball, looked at me as I stood in front of them,
my erection still strong. "So, are you on our side of this yet?" she asked.
Of course it is, I thought, but you knew that didn't you? But that wasn't
what came out of my mouth. "I'm not sure," I told her, a smile on my face.
"I could do with a little more convincing."
Ivy looked over to Batgirl who was now absently playing with her breasts. "I
think she's the one who needs to most convincing," she said.
Batgirl's eyes bulged as Ivy grabbed my cock and led it to its destination.
I felt myself slide into the Toon superhero's wet, silky hole and couldn't
help but gasp. Looking down at her, still clad in her mask, I smiled as I
started to thrust into her. Slow and long at first but it quickly became
fast and hard as she wrapped her legs around my waist, willing me further
Ivy, meanwhile had pulled herself up onto the table and began to lower
herself onto Batgirl's face. Batgirl was quick to respond, like this was
something that happened regularly. Her tongue darted into Ivy's soaking
pussy and started to lick with abandon. Facing each other, Ivy's eyes met
mine. She smiled as wriggled her hips, smothering Batgirl's face with her
I continued to pound into Batgirl, her moans echoing from Ivy's mouth as each
plunge forced her tongue deeper into her friend. I wrapped my hands around
Batgirl's waist, thrusting with abandon until that familiar feeling filled my
groin. "Uh..." I began in an attempt to warn them. I pulled out just in time
to see myself squirt my seed up Batgirl's body, covering her stomach and
tits. A small amount made it as far as Ivy's bush, the white stickiness
mingled with her smooth Toon hairs and her own wetness.
Staggering back a little, I found a chair in just the right place to break my
Ivy removed herself from Batgirl's face. The heroine's face and mask were
soaking wet as she sat up and licked her lips. She walked towards me, both
her hands caressing my face and kissed me. I could taste Ivy's juices in my
After a few moments to recover, she began to walk around the room, picking up
her clothes where they had been dropped. I noticed my cum dripping down her
chest and stomach, dribbling down her thighs. She's need to clean that up
before dressing, I was sure.
"So," Ivy said, bringing me back to the here and now. "I assume you'll be
telling Maroon he won't be getting any kind of leeway from us."
"He won't be happy," I told her. "But what can I do? You won't be convinced."
"Good boy," Ivy smiled. "Now get dressed and go."
Wow. That was quite the brush-off. I had to remind myself that harshness was
part of the villain persona she had been created with and that, I had to
admit, I kinda liked.
Batgirl returned from a small backroom that I hadn't noticed her disappear
into looking a little cleaner and with her pants back on. Her small, perky
breasts were still on display, causing me to smile. "Just a reminder," she
said, her eyes not leaving mine.
* * *
Maroon wasn't happy when I told him that we had indeed had a meeting but
nothing would come of it. The protest was going ahead as planned.
"Didn't you even..." he coughed to hide his embarrassment. "...do what it is
you do to talk them over to a more reasonable perspective?"
"Look, sir, I told you. I don't *do* anything. Things just happen to me."
He chewed on the end of an unlit cigar and briefly complained under his
breath about California smoking laws. "Well that's just not acceptable! If
this goes ahead and we start to lose production time – and money might I
remind you!" He poked the cigar in my direction. "Then I might be able to
afford to keep you on."
He seemed to forget that the miniscule amount I received to just about cover
my expenses didn't even come from the studio anyway. I wasn't going to remind
"Just remember that, Mr. Dickinson, when it all goes to hell tomorrow."
Wow. Mr. Dickinson. So now I wasn't doing his dirty work we weren't on first
name terms any more. Not that I ever was with him.
"It may not be too bad, sir," I countered. Unlike him, I actually had faith
in the Toons to pull off a peaceful protest.
* * *
By the time the next day came to a close I would discover just how wrong I
The protest began promptly at three in the afternoon. I had wandered to the
Toon Town Bridge to watch the protestors come through on their way to the
studio. From what I could guess, almost three hundred Toons turned up, among
them so many familiar faces: Batgirl and Poison Ivy were at the lead, the
first out of the tunnel. Batgirl winked when she saw me on the sidelines. In
their wake poured all manner of Toons. Bugs Bunny, Porky Pig, Daffy Duck. My
drinking buddies Mickey, Bender and Mario. The entire cast of Family Guy, who
knew exactly what it was like to get cancelled. Even Pooh and Piglet appeared
to have closed down the bar the event.
I noted with some disdain that none of the Princesses had made an appearance.
Even in such a large crowd they would have stood out and added a certain
degree if influence to the proceedings. But so many were there, many I didn't
recognise - whether they were extras or just run of the mill Toons I wasn't
sure, but there they were.
The march disrupted all the traffic heading in and out of Toon Town and
quickly a large chunk of Hollywood was blocked as police cordoned off
traffic. The loud beeping of car horns were almost certainly human studio
execs and actors, more likely annoyed at not being able to make their
meetings rather than showing their support.
Of course, I'd read in a few newspapers that several human actors and
directors were showing their support, often those who had worked with Toons
in those rare live action/Toon combos that you see. Rare, of course, because
most humans can't stand working with Toons, accusing them of lack of
professionalism. Well, I hoped they were watching this march. Professionalism
The Toons quickly marched into the MDW lot were there was security waiting.
Chants of "fair wages!", "Toons demand respect!" and "We won't be replaced!"
were met with jeers from execs and several ordinary studio workers whose jobs
would be in jeopardy, Maroon had told them, if the studio gave the Toons what
the wanted. All bullshit, of course.
Things all went wrong when the first custard pie got thrown. It smacked a
security guard in the face, splattering him with cream. At that moment I
realised I should have pointed that out to Ivy and Batgirl during our
"meeting" the day before. The pies attracted some Toons who were unsure of
taking part. What Toon couldn't say no to a custard pie? But humans react
Suddenly, as if taking the first flung pie as a signal, a whole barrage
zipped through the air. The splattering sounds were almost deafening as
security guards and general office workers were hit.
Whistles sounded. The custard-covered security guards lurched forward, billy
clubs in hand. I heard Maroon call out to them to stop. Something about not
needing this kind of publicity. It was too late. I cringed as a small child
Toon (whether she actually was a child or fifty years old I couldn't tell, I
didn't recognise her) got her head smashed in by a club. It rebounded back
to its normal shape seconds later, but the birds twittering around her head
suggested it wasn't a painful experience. Not all Toons are build to
withstand pain like some of their counterparts.
To make a point of this, yelps of pain could be heard in the writhing mass of
human and Toon bodies.
Suddenly a loud, piercing scream put a stop to everything. The security
guards pulled back, unaccustomed to how high-pitched a Toon scream can be.
The crowd quickly moved apart to reveal a lifeless figure on the ground. It
was a Toon, that much was sure but his face was unrecognisable, melted away
to nothingness. Only one thing could do this to a Toon and it had been
outlawed almost sixty years ago.
_ _ _
Next Chapter: Tim finds himself embroiled in a murder case, and pays visits
to the protest organisers and the Princesses...