Simpsons: Springfield Taboo Part 1 - The Trip (no sex,drugs)
"Hey! Wait up Bart!" Cried Milhouse as he fumbled trying to zip up his schoolbag, "Why are you in such a hurry?"
Bart kept walking with his head down, focused intently on a map of Springfield he was holding in front of him. "Keep up Milhouse, Professor Frink's gonna be home soon and I gotta' see if what Jimbo was saying is true."
Earlier that day, Bart was trading Pokemon cards with Nelson, and he overheard Jimbo talking about some magic mushrooms that Professor Frink has in his backyard, said he stole a few and had been triping balls all weekend. Bart had become quite the rebel since his parents separated, his mother had become a fitness freak and spent her days working out and doing yoga, so Bart had free reign of the house and had been getting up to all sorts of mischief. He was smoking cigarettes, drinking alcohol and getting in trouble at school. He even stole a couple of Homer's porno mags before he moved out, Bart loved living on the edge but nothing gave him a rush like jacking off to the MILFs in those magazines. Over the years he'd developed a desire for older women, specifically his aunts Patty and Selma, but most of all his mother, whom he longed for every night.
Bart was 15 now and had developed into quite a handsome young man, and a well-endowed one at that. He spent months combing through each page, each article, fascinated by what he was seeing. All these gorgeous older women with their voluptuous bodies and the naughty sex stories they have to tell. It was a whole new world Bart had been exposed to, and he was hooked.
But Bart was a young man with ever-growing desires, and his mind turned to more dangerous, illegal pursuits. He had smoked weed a couple of times and would occasionally steal bottles of wine from his mother's collection, but he'd never done any hard drugs. "Time to change that" thought Bart as he approached Prof. Frink's house, a large, abstract building, composed of plywood and tinted glass.
Bart surveyed the premises for signs of movement, he was a rebellious kid, but he wasn't ready to go to juvenile detention for trespassing. "It looks clear, let's head in" Bart said as he approached the black-iron fence that surrounded Frink's property.
"This looks risky, we should head home" Milhouse murmured, hardly willing to follow Bart into Frink's backyard. Milhouse stood timidly by the front gate, "Just stay there and keep an eye out!" Hissed Bart, as he hopped the fence and made his way through the Professor's yard.
Bart stealthily crept around the back of the large, cube-shaped abode and approached a small shed in the corner. He saw the door was unlocked, "Prof. Frink was a genius but he never did have much common sense," Bart thought to himself as he opened the shed door.
As he did he was immediately struck with a sense of excitement as he took in the sight before him, an array of scientific equipment, flasks, beakers and burners sat on a large shelf. Multiple jars of organic matter were in a display case beside a small hydroponics garden-bed. On the wall there was a calendar with multiple dates crossed and a sticky-note reading "Reminder: Pick up sample from mother's". Bart quizzed the note for a second before turning his attention to the display case, curious to see what Frink was working on. Most of the jars were empty save for a tranluscent, crimson liquid, but one took Bart by surprise as he inspected closer.
The largest jar of all, it had a gold lid and was labelled 'Frink Breeding Project #1' ... Inside was what looked like a small fetus, curled up with an umbilical cord wrapped around it's neck. Bart gasped and stumbled back, tripping over his shoelace and falling to the ground with a 'THUD!'
He was dazed but okay, sitting up he heard Milhouse calling for him. Bart quickly realised that Frink would be almost home so he scrambled to his feet and began surveying the small garden bed in front of him. All sorts of strange and exotic plants were growing out of the soil, some looked alien, others looked like fruit. Digging through the foliage Bart felt a small nub in the soil.
"YES!" He exclaimed as he sifted through the soil, uncovering five small, purple mushrooms. "These MUST be the ones!" said Bart as he gathered them up and put them in his pocket.
He could hear Milhouse calling again, sounding more ugent this time. Bart realised it was time to go, so he replaced the soil and made his way back around the front of the house. "There you are! C'mon we gotta' get out of here!" yelled Milhouse as Bart jumped back over the fence.
They could hear the buzz of Frink's Hovercar coming around the corner as they sprinted back down the street, Milhouse struggling to keep a hold of his bag whilst Bart made sure not to squash the shrooms in his pocket. They dashed around the corner and stopped to catch their breath.
"So, any luck?" puffed Milhouse, Bart grinned wildly as he reached into his pocket and withdrew the the contents, opening his hand to present the haul to Milhouse. "Whoa, so.. are you doing them tonight?" He asked, to which Bart swiftly replied "You betcha! I'll let you know how I go tomorrow, wish me luck!"
Milhouse stated cautiously, "Just be careful alright? I'll see you tomorrow to debrief." And with that they two boys parted ways and Bart headed back home.
* * *
Twenty minutes later Bart was walking down his street and he could see his Mom's car pulling into the driveway. "Shit, she's already home, I better drop these now before she sees me."
Thought Bart as he stuffed all five shrooms into his gob and began chewing. They tasted horrible, like mud, he took a swig of his water bottle to wash the taste down as he walked through his front yard. His stomach rumbling from the raw mushrooms he ate, he made his way to the kitchen where Marge was unpacking the grocery shopping. "Bart, we're having Roast so make sure you're at the dinner table in 30 minutes." She lectured.
"Yeah, yeah" mumbled Bart as he promptly headed upstairs to his room. His Mother was a great cook, but his stomach was upset and he needed to lie down.
Bart dropped his schoolbag on the ground and slouched onto his bed, he was cold and shivering, so he pulled up his blanket and huddled in a ball, rocking himself to sleep. "I'm okay, I'm okay" He whimpered to himself, instantly regretting his decision to eat Frink's magic mushrooms, he thought if he could just fall asleep he'd be okay.
Bart's eyelids began to grow heavy and his breathing slowed, as he lay there he could hear his sister Lisa retuning home from school. He gumbled to himself, knowing that his mother would be calling him for dinner at any moment. Sure enough, a few seconds later came a knock on his door.
"Bart honey, dinner's on the table" said Marge, as she creaked open Bart's door and peered inside his room. "You hungry sweetie?" She said with a concerned look in her eye.
"Sorry Mom, I'm not feeling too well, I might just have a nap." replied Bart, expecting his mother to protest. He was surprised when he heard her response.
"Awww my special boy isn't feeling too well? That's okay, sleep it off and see how you feel later on." Marge said as she closed the door and made her way back downstairs.
Bart groaned to himself, he was starving but he couldn't bring himself to get out of bed. So instead he lay there quietly, his stomach still rumbling. He curled up into the fetal position and slowly, but surely, nodded off to sleep.
This was no ordinary sleep though, those shrooms had kicked in and Bart was in a psychedelic dream-state. Falling through space and time, visions of his past racing before him, the faint echo of a baby crying was all he could hear as his trip came to an abrupt climax. He found himself weightless, motionless, staring down at a hospital bed in which his mother lay, breastfeeding her child. "That's...me!" thought Bart as he peered closer, feeling a warmth growing inside him, he reached out at the scene in front of him as it vanished, leaving behind nothing but a tiny speck of light amidst the darkness.
Still dreaming Bart traveled towards the light, as it grew brighter the feeling in his loins grew stronger, the light was warm and loving, almost...maternal. Before long it engulfed him, seeping into his pores, filling his heart. Bart called out to the spirit "Who are you?" and instantly he knew.....what, who he was communicating with.... It was God, or at least some representation thereof, a magnificent omnipresence, the creator....Mother....
"Bartholomew... my child... Bare witness to my glory, my eternal love. Throughout time, with father gone, a son would rise up and take thine mother, and his seed of holy matrimony would grow within the mother, and they would be one. This is the way of light, it is through the mother that my spirit has spewed forth for a thousand generations. YOU shall carry this knowledge forward. But be wary my son, for the world is descends unto darkness, and a beacon of light can be snuffed out by those who would keep you from your mothers embrace. Take this wisdom Bartholomew, and spread my love..."
The word "Love" echoed as the light faded and Bart felt himself returning to his physical body. What had he just seen? Did he really just talk to God? Endless questions circled through his mind, the warmth still emanating inside him. He could never comprehend what exactly he saw, but there was one thing that resonated with him above all else, the holy truth he knew, in the deepest part of his being, that he had to make love to his mother.
Part 1 - End