Disclaimer: Seinfield belongs to NBC. I own nothing. This is a parody. If you
are 18 or over, please remain and enjoy the show. If underage, please leave
Seinfield: The Costanza Chronicles (MM,MF,inter,voy)
by The Fan ([email protected])
Foreword: George Louis Costanza...one of the beloved characters of the
American icon and cultural phenomenon of the hit tv show Seinfield. He's a
guy who's had his ups and downs. Blunders with the ladies. Inequities in his
family life. Inadequacies in his professional life. Who is the real George?
Is it the dateless wonder? The savvy but unlucky entrepreneur? The budding
architect? Perhaps he is just another human being trying to make it through
life and finding some happiness. Now, here is a story tellling of George
Costanza's search for love in America.
* * *
Jerry Seinfield sat on his couch in his apartment in New York city. He was a
tall, lean guy with black hair, pale blue eyes and a continuously animated
face. Today, he had nothing to do. Jerry was a stand-up comedian at some
local clubs. He made a decent living that way. Certainly enough to afford his
apartment and other necessities.
Jerry was bored. He was watching tv when he heard a knock on his door. He
opened. It was his friend George Costanza. George was a stocky, balding guy
with glasses. He and Jerry had known each other for a long time. George was
currently a business executive at NBC. He was a smart guy but had some crook
instincts and a tendency to screw up a good thing, which hurt both his
personal and professional life.
George came into the apartment and greeted Jerry. George wasn't feeling too
happy. His department had been downsized and he was now working for a bitchy
boss named Valerie Snyder. She was a lawyer turned executive. A tall,
beautiful woman with a lot of smarts, a sharp eye for business and a
seriously bad attitude. George hated her on the spot. After having a really
frustrating day at the office, George wanted to relax so he came to see his
best friend Jerry. Jerry had that rare ability to take anyone's mind away
from their problems and make them laugh. That's one of the things George
liked about Jerry. It's what brought them together in the first place.
Jerry Seinfield had a wide variety of friends. There was his buddy and
neighbor, the oddball known as Cosmo Kramer. Also, Elaine, a quirky brunette
who was one of Jerry's exes. She was also one of his closest friends. Today,
it was just George and Jerry in the apartment. Everyone else was gone. Elaine
was probably working. Kramer was out doing....whatever in hell he did for a
living. This left Jerry Seinfield and George Costanza home alone, all by
their lonesome. They were two men, critically bored, with nothing to do.
Jerry was watching the television. George was watching...Jerry. Jerry
Seinfield and George Costanza had a secret. They were not just best friends.
They weren't just "almost brothers". They were also fuck buddies. Jerry
Seinfield had a secret bisexual lifestyle which he kept hidden from those
closest to him. George was part of that lifestyle. In fact, George was into
it himself. George's blunders in the romance zone didn't just include women.
They included men, too. Naturally, George kept it to himself. He had a career
to protect and a reputation to uphold. George was a business executive trying
to climb the corporate ladder. If the world knew about his bisexuality, it
wouldn't be good for business. Jerry couldn't afford to let people know his
secret lifestyle either. They were damned if they did, damned if they didn't.
Oh, well. Some things were better left unknown anyway.
"Wanna get out of here?" Jerry asked.
"Sure." said George.
They rushed downstairs and took Jerry's car. They drove around and went to
the movies. Afterwards, they bought some ice cream, walked around Central
Park, walking and laughing. They had a blast. George even stole a kiss from
Jerry behind the bushes. The two men kissed passionately. Jerry looked at
George and smiled. George knew that look. "You wanna do it?" he asked.
"Thought you'd never ask."
The two men grinned like a pair of kids stealing candy (and getting away with
it!) and hurriedly returned back to Jerry's apartment. Once there, they took
their clothes off. Soon, they were both stark naked. George admired Jerry's
tall, lean and muscular body. Jerry was a good-looking man. George had many
insecurities about his looks. He was a bit stocky. Women sometimes complained
about that. Men too, sometimes. Jerry never complained about these things. He
accepted George just the way he was. They began the kisses again.
George drew Jerry down on the warm, soft bed. They were safe from prying
eyes. No one would ever notice them. That's just the way they liked it. The
two of them wrestled playfully on the bed, before things got serious. Their
hard bodies pressed against each other. They wanted each other quite badly.
George lay on the bed, looking at Jerry, the one he loved. "Make love to me."
"Of course." Jerry replied. Jerry kissed George, and then positioned himself
between George's legs. He raised those very same legs so that they rested on
his shoulders. George spread his ass cheeks and waited for Jerry to penetrate
him. Jerry rubbed his cock against George's asshole, teasing him. George
couldn't wait anymore and begged Jerry to enter him. Finally, Jerry did. He
placed his hands on George's hips and thrust into him. George grunted when
he felt Jerry Seinfield enter him. Jerry fucked him, hard and fast. George
stroked his own cock as Jerry fucked him. They went at it like this for a
long time, achieving climax after climax and reaching new pathways to
pleasure as time went by.
They were perhaps in their fifth lovemaking session for the day when they
were startled by a noise. A female voice coming from outside Jerry's
"Who is this?" George whispered.
"It's Victoria." Jerry said.
"Who's Victoria?" George asked.
"My girlfriend." Jerry replied.
"Your what?" George asked.
"Open up, Jerry-boy." came the female voice again.
"You gotta hide." Jerry said quickly. He looked nervously at the door.
"Where?" George asked.
"The closet." Jerry said. He practically threw George into the closet, locked
him in and then went to open the door. George remained quietly in the closet.
He could still see through the nearly closed shutters. He watched as Jerry
Seinfield, his best friend and lover welcomed a woman into the apartment.
George watched this with sad, worried eyes. He could see the woman pretty
clearly. She was a tall, beautiful woman with an athletic build. She had long
black hair and light brown skin. Now, he remembered Jerry mentioning her.
Victoria Dawson. Some black supermodel whom Jerry had recently met. The
African American lady looked hot. George would have found her attractive, if
he wasn't too busy being terrified that she would open the closet door for
some reason. He'd be exposed. She would know. She'd tell the world. He would
be ruined. Silently, he prayed that everything would go smoothly.
Jerry kissed Victoria. She embraced him. "I've missed you, Jerry." she said.
"Not half as much as I missed you." Jerry grinned.
They went to bed. Before George Costanza's very eyes, they undressed. Then,
they started doing it. George didn't want to look. He wanted Jerry to
himself. Unfortunately, Jerry was with this woman and wouldn't leave her.
She was far better-looking than him, anyway. Jerry lay on the bed, his hard
cock in hand. Victoria knelt before him and took him in her mouth. She sucked
on his cock and licked his balls. Jerry moaned in pleasure as Victoria sucked
He soon came, spilling his cum all over. Victoria licked him off without
spilling a drop. Jerry was eager to return the favor. He spread Victoria's
legs and began to eat her pussy like there was no tomorrow. He fingered
her pussy and licked her clit. He drove her wild and soon, Victoria's
pleasure-filled cries could be heard through the apartment.
No matter how much George tried not to hear them, they remained drilled
inside his head. Once Jerry had made her climax, they began humping. She was
on all fours, for the sheer animal passion of it and Jerry was behind her,
his hands on her hips, fucking her from behind. He fucked her, hard. He
shoved his dick deep into her pussy. He plowed into her. Victoria screamed
like a banshee and shook as he thrust into her. They were really into it
now. Hard and fast. The nonstop fucking went on for another hour before the
two lovers lost their energies, sated.
George Costanza fell asleep in Jerry Seinfield's closet. When he woke up, it
was morning. He was greeted by Jerry.
"I'm sorry about last night." Jerry said.
George looked at him. "No, you're not." he said.
Jerry had enjoyed fucking the hell out of that woman. The same way he enjoyed
fucking George. He didn't care for either of them. He was just another
bisexual willing to stick his dick into any warm place that accepted him, ass
or pussy. George had seen many like that. He was sick and tired of them. Last
night was a humiliating experience. Forced to stay in a dark closet while his
best friend and lover fucked a female. "I've gotta go."
Jerry looked surprised. "Where are you going?" He asked.
"Out." George said. With that, the stocky man left.