A Word From The Mistress: In the Voyager episode, Darkling, Lord Byron was
played by my dear friend and Mistress Janeway fan, Christopher Clarke. For
those Byron scholars out there, the one in this log sounds more like the
irreverent actor than a 19th Century poet.

Note Of What Has Gone Before: The Doctor's experiments with altering his
personality had resulted in an aberration which briefly tortured Lt. Torres.
The crisis had past, but not the accompanying bad blood...

Star Trek - Voyager:
The Secrest Logs Of Mistress Janeway Part 20 - Heal Thyself (MF,MFF,BDSM)
by Mistress Nova

Captain's Personal Log:

Chakotay burst into my quarters with a look of rapt anticipation.

"You didn't start yet, did you?"

I gazed up at him from the dressing table.

"I just got here," I said drily. "I was having dinner."

Chakotay took the brush from my hand then got to work on my newly freed
tresses. That felt great after a long day. He got to my scalp with each
stroke. After a least 15 minutes, he was satisfied with the sheen. I was
pulled into his arms.

"I wouldn't begin without my favorite voyeur," I said.

Chakotay wasn't really listening. His eyes were holding mine. He was going
to kiss me again. Of late, he had been doing that frequently wrapping me up
in his arms in a quiet space securing my head by my hair, setting his mouth
against mine tenderly then gently coaxing my tongue to mingle with his while
pressing me close. And that would be all. He would release me. It was lovely
but very confusing.

It was a warm and comforting connection each time, not overtly arousing. It
was as though Chakotay wanted to give me some of his strength. I didn't
realize it until that moment, that at the time of each kiss, I was feeling
mildly out of sorts or pensive or fatigued. The kiss would always lift my

He brought me close then brushed his lips against mine before setting them
in the kiss. His hands were in my hair. His heart was pounding against my
chest during that very sweet, tender moment.

"Thank you," I murmured as Chakotay lifted his lips from mine.

"I can't give you much..." he replied.

"More than enough."

"So," he said as we parted. "What's on the menu tonight?"

The Commander started removing his clothing.

"It's Barrows' log," I said.

Chakotay was naked and in my bed propped on pillows waiting expectantly.

"Comfy? Would you like a snack?" I asked.

"Come on, Kathryn," he smiled. "You enjoy these as much as I do."

Chakotay patted the space beside him in the bed with a smirk. I removed my
clothes as I wandered over to the bed. He pulled me against him and looped
an arm over my shoulders. He pulled over a monitor.

"You are a pervert, you know," I said activating the log.

"Barrows Log One," the Mistress said with a bright smile. I felt my attention
again riveted to her beautiful face. Why did she keep that young visage?
Hell, the answer was obvious. I was wet with the sight of her. "After weeks
of preparation, the luscious B'Elanna was to assist me with the Doctor. I
could barely wait to summon her. Of course, I had some delightful business to

To my utter mortification, I saw myself hanging from shackles naked save for
my boots and gloves. My nipples were weighted. I could instantly feel the
sensation of the clit whip's mark from the punishment I'd received earlier on
my thighs and the fullness of my breasts.

"I will not let your slave see you trained," she whispered in my ear. "But
before I release you, I want to hear your pleasure."

She held me around the waist with one arm then reached between my legs with
the other hand and shoved three fingers in to fuck me. My head dropped back
in ecstasy moaning loudly. I tried to regulate my breathing. Chakotay had a
hard on I could see under the covers, but he remained perfectly still and
transfixed on the screen.

Barrows wrung orgasm after orgasm out of me. Afterward, I was released from
the shackles. I was still reeling and on my knees, but I managed to clean her
hand with my mouth. Then, she kissed me fully and thoroughly making me come
all over again.

"Dress, dear one," she said. "Then, I'll summon your luscious Engineer."

My movements were slow and lethargic. My face was flushed. My eyes were
glazed. Chakotay held me closer. He kissed my temple. I knew that I was in
for some incendiary lovemaking after this viewing.

Torres entered a short while later. She wore a long robe, but the boots
peeked out as she walked. I was seated at Barrow's feet. I could now tell
that Torres strongly reacted to the sight of my Mistress and me. I was still
feeling Barrows' lash and hands and tongue all over my skin. She could see
in my eyes what I had endured and was shaken by it.

Barrows was shaken by her. The Mistress was riveted on my diminutive
fireball. I knew what she wanted to see.

"Remove the robe, B'Elanna," I said.

"Yes, Mistress."

The material slipped from her shoulders to reveal her outfit. She was
stunning and formidable.

"Look at me, sweetness," Barrows said.

Torres complied. Her eyes glittered with intrigue.

"You are quite delectable, my dear," Barrows purred. "Are you ready to play?"

"Yes, Mistress," she replied. "More than ready."

"The Doctor will come when summoned," I said. I was returning to normal.

"How did you manage that, pet?" Barrows asked.

"Yeah, I'd think after his personality problems, he'd be less than
enthusiastic about exploring anything to do with the mind," Torres replied.

"I don't think he can help it," I said. "A good doctor has to have a highly
curious nature to track down diagnosis and cures. Since meeting Mistress
Barrows, he has been brimming with questions. I am certain he feared
offending me," I said. "I've assured him that he may explore to his heart's
content," I said. "Are you ready for him?"

Torres smiled. "I added a couple of sub-routines of my own which will be
activated when he gets here. Our Doctor will feel pleasure and pain."

"Please, don't tell me how you did it, dear," Barrows said.

Torres stifled her next sentence. "Yes, Mistress."

"Enjoy yourselves," I said. "Just don't scuttle the ship."

I left.

"Allow me to set up," Torres asked.

"I'll set the mood," Barrows replied. "And get the company."


"I'd like that delectable Lord Byron to join in," she said. "He has a great

"He has a big dick," I said. Chakotay nudged me to be quiet.

Barrows conjured up a dungeon. Torres looked puzzled.

"It's what he's expecting," Barrow's replied. "Despite all of his
enlightenment, the man views lust largely as a dark emotion."

Torres smirked and nodded. The room transformed. There are many dungeons at
the Club. This one wasn't as classy. Torres asked for a cart with a wide
tabletop. She began to assemble the toys as though they were surgical

"Clever girl," Barrows smiled. "That ought to make him good and nervous."

Lord Byron appeared in the next instant. I knew why Barrows wanted him there
aside from the equipment. He was beautiful with his vibrant blue eyes and
fine classic features. A smile tugged at one corner of his mouth and his eyes
danced as he looked about the room then at Barrows and Torres.

"Vintage Marquis de Sade I would say of the decor," he said appreciatively.
"You ladies look like the nightmare fantasy of my sainted pastor."

"Thank you," Barrows said. "Mistress Barrows at your service, milord. This is
my apprentice, Mistress Torres."

B'Elanna managed a curtsey while stifling a giggle.

"And why have we gathered here today, ladies?" Lord Byron inquired.

"A demonstration of sorts, a lecture to be sure," she said. "Mistress Torres
and I are going to continue the Doctor's education on carnal matters. We
thought you might enjoy being a witness."

"How kind of you," Byron said. "I hope you will school him in more than the
intellectual. He is quite a prig."

"Yes, I know," Barrows said. "And yes, we will."


"Barrows to Emergency Medical Program."

"Yes, Mistress Barrows."

"I believe the Captain told you to expect my call," Barrows said.

"She did."

"You haven't changed your mind, have you?"

"No, I have not."

"I'm ready for you now," she purred looking at Torres.

"I'm on my way."

Torres smiled. "There is one more adjustment that I need to make."

She went to a nearby juncture in a pillar, opened a panel then fiddled with
the insides.

"That's for a little added stimulation," she said. "I can also activate his
subroutines the moment he enters the Holodeck."

Barrows and Lord Byron occupied themselves with discussions of his poetry
while Torres was going over her instruments. As always, my little pigeon was
totally focused on the task at hand. I was very grateful that none of my
flesh and blood crew had so gravely offended her. I couldn't afford to lose
anyone else. And that dear one was looking for blood.

The Doctor breezed in a short time later. He stopped short as soon as he saw
the change in the decor.

"This is... interesting," he said.

Barrows smiled brightly "Some slaves need the trapping of captivity in order
to let themselves go."

"I see, but wouldn't most of the participants in this activity on Voyager be
more sophisticated than... this," the Doctor said.

"Most of them are," Barrows said pointedly.

"Oh, then why would you go through the pretense..." he frowned for a moment
before the realization dawned on him. "Just what are you saying?"

"I believe the lady is saying that you are a provincial prig that prefers to
have his carnal activities in dark, foreboding places where no one can bear
witness," Byron said.

"Well put, milord," Barrows said.

"I beg your pardon," the Doctor said irritably. "I am as sophisticated as any
one of your... your... companions. If I am to learn about your... practices,
I should learn in the appropriate setting."

"Very well."

The setting change back to the Club to the training chamber.

The Doctor looked about the room with an appraising eye. "It's light, airy...
the decor is tasteful and elegant. Impressive."

"Well, now that we've agreed on the interiors, I'd like some more playmates,"
Byron said.

"Who do you have in mind?" Torres asked.

"How about that delicious blonde lieutenant and his delicious oriental
friend," he replied.

"Tom and Harry?" Torres asked.

"What ordinary names for a delightful pair of specimens," the poet replied.

Torres stifled a chuckle. "I don't think that would work."

"And why not?"

"Don't be offended, milord," Barrows said. She shot a cautionary glance at
Torres. "Those two do not belong to me. Their Mistress is not going to share

"How unsporting." Byron said. "Well, Doctor, I hope you are very amusing."

The Doctor eased toward Barrows while keeping a close eye on Byron. "Can we

"Of course," Barrows said. She indicated a place where she wanted him to
stand. "Raise your arms over your head, and try to relax."

"All right."

When the Doctor complied the shackles slid into place over his wrists and
ankles snugly. Torres took great pleasure in stripping the uniform off of
him. She returned to her instrument table, then rolled it over just out of
the Doctor's view. Meanwhile, Barrows strolled around the Doctor with a
critical eye examining him with her riding crop.

"Your prototype is a well conditioned man. It seems you can handle quite a
bit," Barrows said. "How do you feel, Doctor?"

"Very exposed," he said. "I could swear that there is a breeze in here."

"Droll Doctor. What else do you feel?" Barrows asked. Her voice had taken on
a husky tone. She was getting to work.


"That's right. In your current form, I could do anything to you," she said
seductively. "Your flesh is mine to pet and tease and taste until I've had
my fill."

That gave the Doctor an erection which startled him. Barrows gently grasped
it and played with it.

"This is all mine," she said. Her lips were very close to his. "Every inch of
your vulnerable skin is mine to tempt and torment."

Barrows stepped back. She removed her bra and massaged her breasts while
staring at him. I was about to lose it entirely. She looked so lovely. I
wanted to taste her flesh. Chakotay tightened his hold on me.

"I'll take care of you, I promise," he whispered in my ear.

I forced myself to concentrate. The Doctor, I could swear, was as riveted as
I. His eyes never left her while she was in front of him. Once behind him,
the light lash fell a half dozen times. The sensation surprised him. He
inhaled sharply. After the skin on his back was thoroughly reddened, Barrows
brushed her nipples across the area.

"Do you think I'm cruel, Doctor?" She whispered against his ear. "Or

He groaned. Barrows went after him again. "Your life is unpredictable because
of this ship's predicament. But being my slave means incredible randomness. I
can pleasure you or torment you beyond limits physically and mentally."

The whip stopped falling. Barrows caressed his sizzling skin as she moved to
stand in front of him. Again, she grasped his erection and stepped in close
to him.

"You will spend a lot of your free time thinking of how to please me," she
whispered brushing her lips against his. "You'll want to be with me no matter
what I do to you."

Barrows kissed him. The Doctor responded.

"Oh my," he murmured.

"Oh my, indeed," Barrows murmured then quickly jerked him off until he came.
"You are mortified at what I've done. You are incredibly excited. Is this

"Yes," he said with amazement. "Fascinating."

"You see, potential slaves have a craving for intense tactile and emotional
sensation," Barrows said. "They need experiences that push them to the very
edge. Do you want to be pushed to the edge?"

"Well... in the interest of research..." the Doctor said. "I think we should

"Mistress Torres will be the one to stretch your boundaries for a little
while," Barrows said. "I will answer your questions."

Torres walked around the Doctor with a bullwhip in one hand and a wooden
object in the other. The expression on her face made me feel sorry for the

"Good evening, Doctor," Torres said. "I thought I'd use some of the
instruments that you've expressed curiosity about before."

She walked behind him then circled an arm around his waist caressing his
belly. The Doctor relaxed and even started to become aroused once more.

"It's completely lubricated," she purred in his ear. "The object will cause
a fullness and make you feel very aware down there."

I saw the movement when Torres impaled the Doctor. I thought it was a little
rough, but I didn't expect the scream she wrenched out of him.

"Mistress Torres, what did you lubricate that thing with?" Barrows demanded.

"I thought it was lubricant, Mistress," Torres said with dismay, "I think it
was liniment."

Chakotay winced beside me.

"How careless!" Barrows snapped. To anyone unfamiliar with the glean in her
eyes, the statement sounded sincere. "You will have to be punished."

"Yes, Mistress," Torres said with as much glumness as she could manage.

"Do I get to watch?" The Doctor gritted though his teeth. I was amazed at the
details his program got right. He was fighting for breath from the pain, and
he was very, very angry.

"I'm afraid not. Discipline of a Mistress is a private matter," Barrows said.
"I understand you have an arrangement with the Captain"

"Arrangement?" Lord Byron asked. "What sort of arrangement?"

"She allows him to monitor the more intense physical sessions with her
slaves," Barrows said.

"And you seemed so proper," the poet quipped. "You really are a deviant,
aren't you?

"I'm monitoring the physical safety of the crew," the Doctor responded
heatedly. "I get no pleasure out of it."

"And I don't suppose your willie is at attention now, is it?" He replied.

The Doctor was mortified.

Barrows rose from her throne to return to the Doctor, then petted his chest.
"There, there, pet," she cooed. A couple of kisses refocused him. "Sometimes,
a session will get out of hand. It won't happen again."

The Doctor had fallen into her gaze. I knew that place well. She fondled his
nipples pinching them into hardness. Meanwhile, Torres was pacing in the
background with the bullwhip.

"You need to be more aware of your body." Barrows said.

"How is that possible?"

"I'm going to blindfold you," she replied. "It will focus your senses
primarily on the tactile."

After the Doctor was blindfolded, Barrows lashed him once more. It was one of
her finesse whippings. She was bringing his skin to life from his neck to his
ankles. The Doctor was beginning to moan.

"Let it go, Doctor," Barrows said. "Now is not the time to be analytical."

Barrows signaled Torres, then returned to Byron and conjured up a glass of
wine. The first lash of that whip fell with a mighty crack which startled the
Doctor. The pain made him shout.

"You don't use this on your slaves," he gasped.

"Of course not," Barrows said. "But you're a special case."

"Humanoids have a safety mechanism when they reach the threshold of pain,"
Torres said. "With the proper adjustments, that could be blocked. I could
keep you in agony for hours."

The next ten blows were without mercy. The Doctor certainly did let go. The
only reason the Lieutenant stopped was her arm tired. The Doctor's legs
buckled. His head hung forward.

"Mistress Torres," Barrows said. "Your point has been made. Ease his pain."

Torres tossed the whip aside. "Yes, Mistress."

She went to the control panel and punched in a few buttons. The welts
disappeared. The Doctor relaxed. Barrows released the shackles.

"On your knees, pet," Barrows said. "My impulsive young Mistress thought one
lesson you needed was in empathy."

The Doctor nodded. "She was correct."

"Enough punishment then, Doctor," Barrows said. "Time for more of the other
edge of the sword. Pleasure is the best part of an existence."

"I heartily concur." Byron said merrily. "And the more carnal the pleasure,
the better."

"Absolutely," Barrows purred.

A plush carpet appeared beneath the Doctor. Barrows slowly walked toward him.

"Look at me, Doctor."

When his eyes were on her, Barrows removed her panties. "Lay down spread
eagle." The Doctor was shackled again.

"Relax and enjoy," she murmured. Barrows straddled then quickly mounted the
Doctor. She rode him expertly while toying with his nipples. The Doctor's
eyes were locked onto her face. Since he had little experience reigning in
his glands, the poor being didn't last long. It was more than enough for me.
Seeing the Mistress in action like that evoked overwhelming memories. I was
trembling. Chakotay kissed me briefly.

As much to my continued turmoil as to keep the Doctor on edge, Barrows did
not dress. She returned to her throne. Byron handle her the glass she'd left
with him.

"Relentless cruelty and savage coupling," Byron said. "You certainly know how
to throw a party."

"Thank you, darling," Barrows said. "Will you come again?"

"Try to keep me away, dear lady." he said.

Barrows dismissed him. The Doctor was released and clothed in an instant.
"How do you feel, Doctor?"

He seemed to search for the words. "I don't know... on an intellectual level,
I should be ready to flee and never return. But physically, the extremes were

The Doctor turned to Torres who was leaning on a pillar nearby observing.

"Lieutenant, I do apologize for what happened with my other half. You were
correct. My lack of empathy with those who can feel pain does make me view
choices in an empirical manner," he said quietly. "Such decisions will not
happen again without serious consideration."

"Thank you," she replied.

"Splendid," Barrows smiled. "You can explore your curiosity here. I believe
I've demonstrated there is a lot I know."

"Indeed," he replied. "Well, if you'll excuse me, I have a lot to process.

"Of course," Barrows said. "Until next time."

"Ladies," he said then left with haste.

"Well, my dear," Barrows smiled. "It's just you and me."


"Kathryn knows you have been curious about being with me," Barrows said. "She
has decided to leave it up to you. Do you think you're ready for me?"

Torres walked toward Barrows then dropped to her knees. "I would be honored,
Mistress. How may I serve?"

"Get up," Barrows said. "I have a taste for a little Klingon intimacy."

Without preamble, Barrows pounced on Torres knocking her onto her back. She
bit B'Elanna on the face immediately after they hit the floor.

Torres growled then attempted to pin Barrows, but she was nearly helpless
against the strength of a holoprogram. The Lieutenant was deftly stripped
while being knocked about the room. It appeared brutal, but Torres would not
back down.

"This isn't fair, Mistress," she snarled.

Barrows pinned Torres with both wrists above her head straddling her at the

"I know," Barrows smiled, "But I'm sure you'll be beyond caring soon.

Barrows pinched B'Elanna's nipples then pulled on them making Torres gasp.

"What lovely nipples, my dear and so responsive," Barrows said. She lowered
her head to nip at them with her teeth and suck them hard.

Torres began to moan and sob. Barrows watched her intently.

"All the fight is gone isn't it, pet?" Barrows said.

"Yes... yes, Mistress."

"You need me to take care of that wet, throbbing snatch, don't you?"

"Oh... oh... please, Mistress."

Barrows moved slightly so she could reach between B'Elanna's legs. She toyed
with the poor girl's clit until she was nearly screaming.

"You are quite a find. The things I could make you do... make you take... for
this." Barrows said. Shoving her fingers inside while her thumb continued
torturing B'Elanna's sensitive nub. After the coming subsided and the moans
quieted to a whimper, Barrows made Torres clean her hand and dress.

"Thank you, Kathryn. I've enjoyed myself thoroughly," Barrows said. "And
doing this log was fun as well. I love people admiring my work. I also enjoy
knowing that the beautiful Commander is about to pound you senseless because
of it. Barrows out."

* * *

The screen went dark. Chakotay inhaled then exhaled. He turned off the
monitor, pushed aside the unit, fluffed up his pillows then turned to me. The
look in his eyes made me start to moan. She slanted his mouth across mine in
a searing, hungry kiss.

I'm not sure what happened next.


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