Characters/Actors involved: Jennifer Garner, Jessica Alba/Max Guevara, Eliza
Dushku, Kim Possible, Paige Matthews, Phoebe Halliwell, Kirsten Dunst, Bobby
Hill, Penelope Pitstop, Dick Dastardly, The Hooded Claw, and Sarah Michelle
The first two parts of this story are over at CSSA; the contents of this
tale are fictional. The real people as presented in this story are not
intended to be portrayed as they are in real life. The fictional characters
used are the properties of Spelling Television, Twentieth Century Fox Film
Corporation, Mutant Enemy, Kuzui Enterprises, Sandollar Television, Disney
Enterprises, Hanna-Barbera, TF1 and Marathon Animation, and are used here
purely for fantasy purposes. The content isn't meant for under-18s, and any
comments to go to [email protected] or to the message boards.
...Make Me Feel So Damned Unpretty, Part 3: Conversations With Dead People
by Victor Field (mF, FF, MMF, F-mast, con, anal, oral)
Jessica Alba says "Previously on '...Make Me Feel So Damned Unpretty'":
Three identical, incredibly beautiful female arrivals in Hollywood. The
disapperances of Jennifer Garner, Jessica Alba, Sarah Michelle Gellar,
Kirsten Dunst, Eliza Dushku and Brittany Murphy. A teenage boy who loves
writing celebrity erotica. The cast of "Charmed" having dreams about
episodes guest starring Miss Alba. Jennifer Garner meeting Kim Possible
on her own turf. And Jessica Alba face to face with a) Willow Rosenberg's
late girlfriend Tara and b) Scooby-Doo's redheaded sexpot friend Daphne...
Now read on. (Or go to CSSA if you haven't read the first two parts.)
* * * * * * * * * *
Jessica's mind was racing around, trying to figure out what was going on.
She was in a house from one TV show, talking to characters from two other
"This is all a trick, right? Dushku put you up to it, right?"
"A trick?" Tara repeated. "This isn't a trick."
"Oh come on, Amber..."
"My name's Tara. When Amber was cast as my role I started to look like her,"
she told her.
Jessica started to back away slowly, waving her arms in front of her. "Okay,
now this is just TOO weird... YOUR role?"
Daphne sighed and walked over to her in the usual Hanna-Barbera slightly
stiff manner. "Look, we'd better explain something to you."
"I'm drunk, that's it," Jessica babbled, moving away from the cartoon
character. "That or I'm dreaming... yeah, that's it, when I went into
Brittany's trailer I must have tripped and knocked myself out..."
"You're not dreaming," Tara told her as Jessica found herself by the door
and fumbled for the doorknob. "And it wasn't a dream when you were in the
bath with Phoebe Halliwell either."
Jessica's hand stopped, and she faced the two women. "How did you know that?
I never told anyone about my dreams," she told them softly.
"I told you, they weren't dreams."
Jessica sighed. "Like you said, Daphne - you'd better explain something to
* * * * * * * * * *
Kimberly Ann Possible had seen a lot of in her young life; but never, ever
had she expected to see something like this. Even her brothers had stopped
acting up for the first time in living memory.
"Oh my Bob..." she finally said. "You're a live one? Here?"
"A... what?" Jennifer Garner asked, getting more cramped by the second in
the net. Kim wielded a knife and cut the ropes, sending the tall actress
falling to the carpet. That felt real enough...
"But you shouldn't be here, Syd!"
"First of all Kim, I'm not a spy," Jennifer corrected. "I just play one on
TV. And secondly, what in heaven's name is going on here?"
"Wait a minute," cried Jim. "You're not - "
" - Sydney Bristow?" Tim finished.
"Can we talk without the Greek chorus?"
"You heard her," Kim said. "Tweebs out."
"But we caught her!"
"I'm not sure she wanted to be here in the first place. It would certainly
explain what's been happening around here," the teen mused, shooing her
brothers out and slamming the door shut behind them. "And NO listening at
the keyhole this time!"
Kim and Jennifer heard footsteps receding; Jennifer was about to open her
mouth when Kim shook her head, tiptoed over to the door and shoved it hard.
"OW!!!" yelled the siblings, and this time they DID leave.
"Okay," Miss Possible said as she returned to Jennifer. "So you're the one
who's got Sydney's form. Her creator picked a nice one, I'll give him that."
"You mean J.J. Abrams? And what do you mean, she's got my form? And why'd
you say 'Oh my Bob'? Is that what they call God around here?"
"Come on," Kim sighed, opening the window and climbing out. "You and me have
a lot to talk about."
* * * * * * * * * *
Shooting on "Silencers" was through for the day, and the faux Jessica Alba
was unwinding. It had been rough, but the filming had gone smooth as silk;
Eliza was likely to be back before long as well, if all went according to
For the time being, all she could think of was how nice it was to be in bed
with the real Jessica's fiance. No wonder she stayed with him even after
their show was cancelled; must have been real love. Not that she could blame
him. That was why she was thinking of him even as Tracy Ryan nuzzled her tits
and happily caressed her body.
Tracy, more than Ellen or even Sara, was an unrepentant slut. She was also
very, very good at getting people to go to bed with her in the first place,
which - capped with Brittany Murphy's willingness - had made her job all the
"Am I as good as four-eyes?" she asked, lapping at Jessica's nipples.
"Better," she sighed. "Don't have to worry about getting knocked up." Jessica
pushed Tracy's head down, and the woman obligingly tongued her navel before
facing her amazingly sexy little cunt. Tracy slowly licked it, feeling
Jessica vibrate a little, and tasted the opening more. She wanted to keep her
lover going for as long as possible.
As she kissed and sucked, Tracy remembered how she had rimmed her earlier;
Jessica had such a perfect ass, the climax of a journey down the gorgeous
lady's back. And it had started when she had brushed the hair from the back
of Jessica's head and tenderly kissed the barcode she had on her neck. A
barcode which no one but Tracy could see.
* * * * * * * * * *
The real Jessica watched as the vision of what was happening in the "real"
world, as conjured up by Tara, faded away. Jessica was feeling sick.
"So what you're saying is... that's Max?"
Daphne nodded. "She was one of the first to make the Jump in reverse."
"Yes," Tara continued. "It's easier if the Creators don't have any more
control over their characters."
"James and Charles," Daphne continued. "You know, the people who 'created'
that show. This place - this universe - is where all the characters 'created'
in all forms of storytelling live."
"You mean this is a sort of the Land of Imagination?"
"Well, if you think up something it has to come from somewhere. Everything is
just floating around, waiting for someone to give it a name and a setting;
they don't take any real shape until the Creators pick or draw someone who
fits the image. Like Faith here..." and Tara visualised where Eliza was. "She
was noncorporeal around here until they cast Eliza Dushku. And around here
the Creators' word is law - if it wasn't for them we wouldn't be here right
"In your case, because 'Dark Angel' was cancelled, the Creators could no
longer guide the destiny of the characters as they had for two years, so...
oh my Joss."
Tara had found Eliza Dushku. But she was strapped down in a strange looking
"Eliza's here as well..."
* * * * * * * * * *
Eliza had vanished along with Kirsten, but she didn't know why she had wound
up here while her friend had gone somewhere else.
She did know where she was; she was in an enormous chamber, on a table.
Fortunately, there was no pendulum swinging downwards - in fact, there was
nothing that was doing her harm at all. Actually, she almost liked it.
Her captor had placed her at the centre of a giant machine; she was hooked
up to the entire apparatus. Eliza was also completely naked, with links to
all her extremities. Though she wasn't sure she couldn't work her way out,
she wasn't sure she wanted to.
Because the first time she had moved her arms, she had found they caused two
tubes with brushes to move forward and skirt along her breasts; Eliza saw
that when she moved them back, the brushes went back. Back and forth, back
and forth... nice little tickling effect there. Eliza couldn't resist a
little smile at how it felt.
That was what happened when she moved the arms forward and back; moving them
from side to side activated the connections to her legs, causing them to be
pulled apart. This in turn activated what her captor had called the Train.
("Train in the tunnel? Get it, honey?") It was in fact a toy train that was
chugging up the track slowly, its engine padded. Eliza craned her head
upwards to watch the train as it touched her pussy... but only touched. Eliza
would have to move her arms farther for it to go inside, because it would
only be when she was fucked by Thomas the Tank Engine there that the links
would be broken and she would be free.
Eliza knew she could do it. She relaxed, let the train move down, and
gathered her strength.
"Oh, don't give up now..." her captor said out of nowhere.
"Not a chance!" Eliza called.
"Maybe you could use a li'l bit of incentive."
Eliza felt the table under her move slightly from the base of her back, as
the pleasure she felt disappeared. "That table you're on is gonna be moving
an inch for every time you don't manage to get that train up you. Or every
ten minutes. Or both. So unless you really want to find out how it feels to
be Stretch Armstrong..."
* * * * * * * * * *
"Fuck me with a chainsaw," Jessica Alba whispered as she watched Eliza start
to play with herself again. "We've got to get her out of there."
"Before we can go, we need to explain the whole thing to you," Tara added,
removing the vision. "You and her aren't the only live ones here."
"Yeah, I know Brittany Murphy's here as well; she came here just before me."
Tara conjured up another image. This time it was of the van that had
Brittany; it was speeding along the road, with no visible destination as yet.
The witch and Daphne's mouths dropped open; they knew where it was going.
This was worse than they had thought.
"What is it? Who's got her?"
"They work for the people behind all this," Daphne told her. "The same people
who've got Sarah Michelle Gellar. We've got places to go... come on, we'll
explain to you on the way." And the two women hustled Jessica upstairs.
"But how are we supposed to get there - " Jessica started as she stepped onto
...and found herself on a pavement outside. In an entirely different city.
"Oh," she finished.
* * * * * * * * * *
Kirsten Dunst's journey had taken her in an entirely different direction. She
had landed in a grassy field on a bright morning, and for a moment she lay
there, wondering why she was still alive... and where she was.
The actress groggily got to her feet, her eyes taking in her surroundings.
She was in a field all right, but it was outside a building - she must be in
"Hey! Are you all right?"
Kirsten looked around to see who was talking to her, and saw a tall, tanned,
black-haired teenage girl running towards her. "I said to my friends 'Hey,
look, there's someone falling out of the sky,' and they didn't believe me..."
The girl had the kind of wide eyes, exaggerated mouth movements and peculiar
running style you usually saw on Japanese-animated TV shows. "What happened?"
"I... I don't know," Kirsten replied to the friendly young woman as she was
helped up. "All I know is I woke up on this lawn here... that and my name..."
"Well, come on. Me and my friends'll set you straight."
"Thank you... thank you so much."
"Oh, I'm sorry - my name's Alex," her new friend added.
"I'm Anna," Kirsten replied, shaking her hand gratefully as the two cartoon
characters walked away.
* * * * * * * * * *
Penelope Pitstop, pink-preferring blonde racing driver and heiress, was
trapped between her dual enemies. The evil Dick Dastardly was at her front,
sneering into her face and twirling his moustache at the thought of what was
coming next, and the cruel Hooded Claw was behind her. There was absolutely
no way out. She let out her trademark piercing scream as Dastardly plunged
his weapon into her...
"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" No wonder they called him "Dick."
"You scream all you want, my dear Penelope," Dick sniggered as he pushed
himself inside. "There's NO ONE here to help you! No one at ALL!"
"Oh, shush!" countered the Hooded Claw, his cloak lifted up to show that he
was naked underneath, and sporting a prick that to his immense satisfaction
was bigger than Dastardly's (and Peter Perfect's). "You don't want to get
out of this one, do you, Penelope?"
"Mercy, no...!" giggled Miss Pitstop, feeling the Claw's cock pressing
against her rump. She squealed for joy as her arch-nemesis jammed it up her
fast and hard while Dastardly dug his fingers into her pink top and ripped
it off. Penelope was all pink and tasty underneath; never mind her car, she
had one hell of a fine bodywork herself. Her breasts were a lot bigger than
they looked on TV, and she couldn't wait for DD to get his dick between
them... OOOOOOHHHHHHHHH, the Claw knew how to treat's a lady's buns.
Thrusting in and out like a piston, he moved his cloak along her naked body
to give her an extra tingle.
Penelope shut her eyes so she wouldn't have to see Dick's grimacing face as
he pumped her and played with her jugs. "Open wide, Penelope...!"
She cautiously opened her eyes.
"Not the eyes, you automotive airhead - your mouth, your MOUTH! Sometimes I
wish Muttley hadn't taken up with Dynomutt and the Blue Falcon..."
Though threeways weren't uncommon around here - Penelope had never forgotten
the time she had visited Mainframe and found out about Enzo, Andraia and
Megabyte - she threw that particular image out of her mind and focused on
Dastardly's cock; secretly she liked sucking him as much as he liked being
sucked, but she had to play up to him. She rolled his cut prick around on
her tongue and opened wide, and howled as the Claw forced himself all the way
inside her anus. The man was speeding up...
Dastardly took advantage of the yawning gap to force his cock into her mouth
and down her throat. Penelope sucked fiercely, trying not to gag as she did;
she could and would make him come quickly - she liked to keep them hanging,
but this would be for the automotive airhead thing.... plus she could listen
to the Hooded Claw's voice shriek higher and louder...
Penelope soon yelled as the Claw's prick spurted into her, but for once it
was Dastardly who finished first. And not before time; the lights in her
boudoir were flashing green. She had business elsewhere.
* * * * * * * * * *
Howard sat there as his parents finished berating him, as they had been
for the past ten minutes... but he let all their cries about how could he
embarrass them like this pass over his head. He knew he could look forward
to a grounding for this, but he didn't care.
All he really cared about was his secret lineup of ladies. He could use that
for his fantasies tonight. Yeah... all of them paying tribute to Tracy Ryan.
The others were too good to ignore, but Tracy was The One.
Howard found his prick rising all on its own just thinking about Tracy.
"...and if you ever do anything like this again, you're in for it."
"We should really punish you for this, but we know you're just a growing
kid. So you're just confined to your room for the weekend, and don't do this
again, all right?"
"Yeah, okay," Howard replied calmly.
"Good," his dad nodded. "Now get out of here," he added amiably.
Howard nodded and went upstairs as his parents watched.
"He's not really such a bad boy," his mother said. "I guess things could have
"He's got good taste in women as well," his father said sotto voce.
"What was that?"
"Oh, nothing," he said hastily.
* * * * * * * * * *
The vista had changed, with the deserted landscapes giving way to signs of
civilization, and the ground becoming grassier. The van carrying Brittany
Murphy was withing spitting distance of its destination; Fred and Norville's
cargo had calmed down somewhat.
Brittany had also changed somewhat. Her body had contorted so that her neck
had become longer, her torso more squat and her legs longer and thinner.
Her arms were becoming shorter and curving unnaturally, and her face was
distorting as her eyes and mouth grew larger.
"We'll be there soon," Fred assured her as they neared their base. "You'll
be meeting your friends soon."
"You mean Eliza and Jessica?" Brittany asked, but neither he nor his friend
Because while Brittany had said "You mean Eliza and Jessica?", what they had
heard was "Beep beep!"
* * * * * * * * * *
"Let me get this straight," Jessica Alba recapped as the three women headed
through the city they were in. "There are all these different worlds..."
"For all these different creations..."
"And they stay there after their shows have been cancelled."
"And they don't really overlap, but you can travel between them if you just
think of the world you want to go to - but you can't go into the real world."
"Except that someone managed to find a way."
"And now we're getting people going back and forth, and if we don't get them
all back soon - "
"They'll all come together, you've got it now," Daphne interrupted. "And
we'll all be destroyed, we can't keep existing side by side, all right?"
"So how long do we have?"
"Around here time isn't really a factor. Luckily for you," Tara said.
"Keep an eye on Eliza," the witch continued. "You'll understand."
Once again Jessica found herself seeing Eliza in the machine.
* * * * * * * * * *
"This is so weird," Jennifer Garner said as she and Kim Possible walked
"What colour's the sky?" asked Kim.
Jennifer looked up, and said "Blue."
"What colour's the grass?"
"How many fingers am I holding up?" And Kim spread her entire right hand.
"Five," Jennifer replied.
"So what's so weird?"
"Well... where is everybody? It's like it's the middle of nowhere."
Kim made a face. "Oh, don't get me started on that place! Ron got himself
stuck with Courage once and I had to go there and rescue him... that Eustace
is one miserable son-of-a-beach-blanket..."
"Son of a BEACH BLANKET?"
"Rules are rules, Jen. Disney characters don't get to swear unless they're
from Touchstone. But you're right, it's been a lot quieter around here since
"Since who left?"
"Since - since nearly everyone," Kim replied. "Everyday I go and try to find
a clue to who's making everyone vanish... I can't even get Wade; I even went
to his house, and nothing."
"He wasn't there?"
"His HOUSE wasn't there. It's like everything's being wiped out or
something... that never happens around here, not even when the Creators pull
the plug in the real world. I've been hunting up the usual suspects - Monkey
Fist, Drakken and Shego, Senor Senior Senior... they've been going as well."
"What are you going to do, wait until whoever's taking them comes for you?"
"You got a better idea?"
"Ron says he does," Kim said thoughtfully. "He wants us to meet him at Bueno
Nacho..." Her voice tailed off.
They had reached the spot where it was supposed to be. But no sign of the
building or of Ron. In fact, the only thing there was a little bundle,
wriggling on the ground; Jennifer spotted it first, and picked it up
gingerly, untying it.
A small pink creature popped out gratefully with a happy squeak. "Hey, how'd
you get in there, little fella?" asked Kim, joining Jennifer to see Rufus.
Rufus mewed, and patted his stomach.
"He's hungry?" Jennifer suggested, and watched as Rufus retched once. An
instant later, she shrieked as a small cassette and some molerat vomit landed
on her palm...
A few more instants later, the fictional spy and the real one were listening
to the message from Ron: "KP, I don't have much time - but I know what's
happening here; they'll probably be here before you get here, but you've got
to get to Sleeping Beauty's Castle; it's all coming together there. And
you're not going to believe this, but I know where she... come on, Rufus, I
can hide you before they come - " Then a click.
"Sleeping Beauty's Castle?" Kim said pensively. "Long way to go, and it's the
only place we're not allowed to use short cuts to go directly to... but I got
a favour to pull in. Just wondering what Ron meant about knowing where she
is... I mean, who's she?"
"I know," Jennifer said slowly.
* * * * * * * * * *
The morning rays hit the beach house where Ashley lived; the warmth of the
sun shining through the windows onto her face was normally enough to wake up
the witch. But she had already been awake for hours, and was in fact on the
Ashley wasn't paying any attention to the sun, however. She had her tongue
deep inside Paige's mouth as she embraced the young woman, the two lying near
the surf. The tide was coming in as they made love; Ashley loved feeling the
water rushing over the two of them, because it excited them even more.
Paige felt the ocean flowing over her bare flesh, the water lapping along her
snatch as Ashley hungrily kissed her again and again. The two had hardly said
a word, but they didn't need or want to. All Paige wanted was for Ashley to
bite her, to lick her, to use her for all eternity - screw sisterhood, screw
their sense of duty, she needed someone like Ashley. And if the sisters
didn't like it, tough...
Ashley fondled Paige's body, enjoying her perfect tits and fine furry
opening. She felt Paige groan as she pinched her juicy behind; Ashley was
dying for her to turn over so she could tongue it. As if Paige had received
some kind of mental command, the redhead gently pushed Ashley away and
turned over. She sighed deeply - like her sisters, Paige had a glorious ass.
From the beach house, Phoebe watched as Ashley moved her hands in circles
over Paige's buns; she could see Paige's eyes and mouth gaping in happiness
as Ashley applied her tongue to her back door.
"That should be ME there, you hybrid cunt," Phoebe growled, wishing she could
have had some real kick ass powers as Ashley spread her fingers outwards and
started playing with Paige's tits. Who did she think she was, stealing Ashley
Phoebe glanced at Piper, sleeping soundly. At least Piper had Leo... she
didn't have anybody. She couldn't bring herself to watch her half-sister
fucking the woman she loved. Willing herself not to cry, Phoebe turned away
and began to think of how she was going to teach Paige a lesson.
* * * * * * * * * *
"I know you. You're the girl I had a crush on."
Sarah Michelle Gellar knew she should have gotten used to this by now, but
the sight of Bobby Hill talking to her face to face was still a freaky one.
"You were really mean to me," Bobby continued in that whiny voice of his.
"And a real prissy little miss too. But I forgive you."
"Well, thanks. But why?" asked Sarah.
"Why, 'cause you're going to make things easier for yourself!" Bobby laughed.
"All you gotta do is make a choice." And Hank Hill's firstborn plumped
himself down on Sarah's cot. "You can either give me my first blowjob, or - "
"Fuck off and die, Bobby!" Sarah interrupted.
Bobby shook his head. "No, ma'am. I can't."
"Fuck off? Or die?"
"Either. Look at your friend Eliza there..."
Sarah (and Jessica) looked at the vision of Eliza in the machine...
The table had turned several times, and Eliza had battled with it. She was
getting closer each time, but the train never went inside her more than a
couple of millimeters. By now she was desperate...
"Come on... please... oh please let me do it..." Eliza begged, as she
strained. Her legs had been spread so wide that they were almost at a
180-degree angle, and her arms felt as if they were popping out of their
sockets, and if Eliza had reached this point sooner there would have
been no trouble. But still nothing. And her captor was watching with a
smile, but an impatient look.
"Looks to me like you could use a little help," said her captor amiably,
and gave her it a second later.
"OHMYGODDDDNOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" was the last sound Eliza Dushku
made before she felt and heard her arms, legs, spine and neck snapping as
the table stretched her to breaking point and beyond. She was dead.
* * * * * * * * * *
Dropping her head, Jessica Alba felt her stomach turning as Tara and Daphne
held her to stop her collapsing. She'd just seen her colleague be tortured
to death and she couldn't do a thing about it... and why were they so calm?
And why was the machine still whirring? She could hear it... Jessica looked
up, her eyes blurry with tears.
"Here," Daphne said gently, and wiped Jessica's eyes dry. The actress blinked
and gasped - Eliza Dushku was back as she was before, with the settings as
they had been at the beginning.
And she was alive.
"That's the way it goes in these parts, honeybuns," Penelope Pitstop said to
Eliza. "You can't really die around here, but you can still feel pain. And
if you don't get out of this machine, you're going to be going through this
whole thing again... and again... forever." She patted Eliza's head and
Alone in the room, Eliza Dushku finally burst into tears.
* * * * * * * * * *
"Get rid of it," Sarah told Bobby, looking at her with a smirk. "GET RID OF
"You heard the lady," Bobby said, as the vision disappeared. "So now, you
ready to talk a deal?"
"What do you want?" asked the blonde sullenly.
"You won't have to be shot again or anything like that ever. You might even
get to go. All you have to do is either let me know what it's like to get
head, or a handjob."
"Suppose I do both?"
"YES!!! That would be so cool..." Bobby gurgled.
Sarah beamed, as she started to undo Bobby's shorts. "Okay, let's just see
what we've got here..." She put her hand inside, and nodded as she got the
measure of Bobby's equipment. Not bad for a kid his age. And height.
Bobby couldn't help squirming as Sarah let his shorts drop, displaying his
lower half for all to see. His dick and sacs just lay there in her hands,
and he couldn't talk as she started to play with them, gently stroking and
rubbing the cock as it started to grow. Sarah hummed to herself as she moved
her fingers along Bobby's genitals, waiting for them to big enough. He didn't
even have any hairs growing out of them yet, but that made it better - no
fears of having any of them stuck in her teeth when she sucked them.
When Bobby's prick had swollen as much as it ever would, Sarah started to
suck on the tip of it. Bobby made some weird noise that sounded as if he
liked it. Probing the tip with her tongue and suspecting that he had
inherited his narrow urethra from his father, Sarah licked the underside
and kissed it, going over the lad's penis from end to end. "Ready?" asked
the pint-sized actress.
"Uh-huh..." the even shorter and dazed Bobby moaned.
Sarah closed her mouth around his cock and began to swallow. It was kind of
strange having something like this in her mouth (though funnily enough, Bobby
wasn't that much smaller than Freddie). But she wasn't sure she didn't like
it...she drew the full length into her mouth and grabbed a hold of his
squishy behind. If this was what it took to get her out of here, it was worth
"Uhh.. uhhhh... uhhhhhrrrrggghhh...." mumbled Bobby, getting warmer and more
excited as she consumed him. He had always wondered what it would be like to
get head; now he knew why folks made such a fuss. And getting it from a live
one - oh man, no wonder some of them didn't want to come back...
Bobby suddenly felt something shooting out of his cock; Sarah felt her mouth
filling up, jerked her head back and spat it out; animated cum tasted and
felt just the same as the live article. But he was still a bit stiff; she
grasped the cock, and thrust on it once. It was all he needed; Bobby was so
excited that the rest of his load fired directly onto Sarah's face. How on
earth could he have produced so much of that stuff...?
"Not bad," Sarah grinned through the liquid. "Not bad at all."
Bobby had an even bigger (and genuine) grin on HIS face. "Nice; real nice..."
He pulled his shorts back up and walked back out of the room, reliving it
over and over in his mind.
Sarah watched him leave, thinking that things would be a bit better from now
* * * * * * * * * * *
"How'd you get here again?" Clover asked.
Kirsten was still hazy, but she was grateful for Alex's help; she had brought
the girl to the house she shared with her two friends and fellow students,
redheaded Sam and blonde Clover, and had promised she could stay with them
until it was sorted out.
"I can't really remember..." Kirsten replied, taking the drink Sam offered.
"It's all hazy... wait. Something's coming back... I keep thinking of horses.
"Russians? You don't sound Russian!" Sam said.
"We're French. We don't sound it," Clover pointed out.
"Ix-nay on the Reators-Cay."
"Relax, Anna. We do this kind of thing all the time," Alex assured her.
"Solving mysteries is a sort of hobby of ours."
"And we're not at school now what with it being the holidays and all," Clover
added, "so just tell us everything you know and we'll help you out."
"That's if we don't get called by WOO..." Sam started before the other two
"WOOO...man's Wear Daily," she finished. "We do some freelance writing for
"You're freelance writers and students?" Kirsten asked.
"Hey, we have to pay for this place somehow," Alex told her. "Finish up the
tea, Anna - it's getting cold."
Kirsten sipped it, and winced - no danger of it getting cold any time soon.
Or sweet. "I don't want to be a nuisance, but could you put a bit more sugar
"No prob," Alex said, and took the cup to the kitchen as Kirsten continued.
"I know I was on some kind of movie set... I might have been visiting or
something, I dunno."
"Maybe that's why you're thinking about Russians and horses - you were on a
set making a movie about them?"
"Yeah, maybe... and something else. The last thing I remember before I found
myself here was seeing a green light."
"You're kidding!" Sam and Clover chorused. "Aliens?"
Kirsten shrugged as Alex returned with her tea. "Maybe. It would explain what
I'm doing here. Oh, thanks," she added as she accepted and took a swallow,
sighing in satisfaction. "Much better... I'm sure things'll come back to me
after I've had a - "
She passed out, spilling the tea on the carpet. The faces of the girls from
"Totally Spies!" changed from bubbly and caring to much, much more serious;
as soon as Kirsten had mentioned the green light, they knew that the other
woman who had been screwed up in transit had arrived. The sugar Alex had put
in her tea had been dosed with enough drugs to keep her under for an hour,
by which time Kirsten - or Anna - would be at
* * * * * * * * * *
Jennifer Garner couldn't believe that they were nearly there. It had taken
about four hours of flying time, during which her pilot - Kim - had taken
her mind off her problems at home by pointing out the countryside below,
featuring some of the cities from Disney TV shows and movies ("We're now
flying over St. Canard..."). And now, through the clouds, they could see
the spires of Sleeping Beauty's Castle.
"And we're just going to land in it?"
"I wish - Mickey doesn't like it. We're going to land by it and walk inside.
If we're lucky," Kim added.
"What do you mean?"
"It's just that... Jenny, what are you looking at?"
Jennifer's attention had been caught by what was flying by the plane. She
beamed and waved at what she saw there; a little fairy, keeping up with the
speeding plane, and waving a wand.
"Oh my God," Jennifer smiled, "it's Tinkerbell."
"Oh my Bob," Kim groaned. "IT'S TINKERBELL!" And as Tinkerbell raised her
wand, Kim banked the plane sharply to take them away from the fairy, causing
Jennifer to almost fall onto her.
"What was that all about?!?" the actress shouted as she found her bearings.
"You know how Tinkerbell's always flying around and waving her wand and
making all those flashes of light?!" Kim yelled as Tink waved her wand.
A second later, a massive explosion shook the plane, barely missing it.
"She's guarding the castle!" Kim shouted as she got the plane back under
control and went for the Castle again. "The girl isn't as sweet as she looks!
Hang on, Jen - it ain't gonna be easy..."
The Castle was close, but Tinkerbell was getting closer. The fairy dived in
for another attack...
* * * * * * * * * *
Scott Foley was drunk, and now passed out. He was being tucked into bed at
home after his night out had not gone according to plan.
Ellen Devereaux looked down on him fondly. He really wasn't such a bad kid
really; too bad about the metamorphosis. But anything she could do to help
it along... she looked at herself in the mirror and chuckled. She then
realised she was looking at her real self, and started to concentrate on
how Ellen looked; Ellen was not all dark hair, great body and green colour
Jennifer Garner was right. She DID know where Shego was.