Family Ties: The Lost Episodes Part 1 - Skippy's Visit (mF,1st,anal)
by Leper Messiah

Multi-chapter parody of the 80's sit-com "Family Ties. In this, the first
episode, the nerdy neighbor Skippy Handelman finds himself locked in the
basement with Mrs. Keaton. They take the opportunity to get to know each
other better...

* * *

Skippy Handelman knocked on the door of the Keatons' house and waited
nervously on the doorstep. The door was answered a few seconds later by
Elise Keaton. She was wearing a pair of cut-off denim shorts and a white
T-shirt. Skippy noticed that she wasn't wearing a bra and her nipples
were poking through her T-shirt. He tried not to stare. Mrs Keaton always
looked so sexy, he thought.

"Hi, Skippy," Elise said pleasantly. "What can I do for you?"

"Hi, Mrs. Keaton. here?"

"I'm sorry, Skip, she's not. She went out to Earth Day rally with Steven
and Jennifer and Alex."

"Alex went to an Earth Day rally?" asked Skippy, shocked that the
arch-conservative Alex Keaton would go to an environmental event.

"Steven is making him," laughed Elise, "He really didn't want to go."

'Oh, " said Skippy, shyly, " was supposed to get some stuff from
Mallory. She wants me to help her with a term paper. She said she has some
books and some notes that she wants me to look at."

"I see," said Elise.. "Well, come on in. Let's go look in her room.

Elise turned around and Skippy followed her into the house. Her shorts clung
tightly to her shapely behind. And they were cut off really short. They
didn't quite cover her ass. Skippy could see the taught crescents of her
buttocks peeking out from beneath the fringe. He tried not to stare at her
bottom as they walked. It would be really embarrassing if he got an erection.

They searched Mallory's room but they didn't find the books or the notes that
they were looking for. After searching Mallory's desktop and drawers, they
made a cursory examination of the rest of he room. Skippy idly opened a
dresser drawer and found it full of folded panties. He stared, mesmerized for
a moment, then absently fumbled about a bit in the drawer, not knowing why,
just wanting to touch Mallory's underwear.

"I really don't think she keeps her homework in her underwear drawer," said
Elise from behind his shoulder.

Skippy jumped a little.

"Of course not Mrs. Keaton, I was just...straightening it out a little."

"Uh huh...well, I'm sure that Mallory would appreciate it," said Elise, a
little sardonically, "but why don't we just close the drawer now, ok?"

Elise nudged Skippy aside and started to close the drawer. The something
caught her eye and she stopped.

"Hm...what's this?" she said, bemused.

She reached into the drawer and held up a sleek silver vibrator.

"Well, now you know that Mallory has a hobby,' smiled Elise. She put the
vibrator back under the undies where she found it and closed the drawer.

"You know, Mallory was doing some homework down in he basement yesterday,
Elise said thoughtfully. Jennifer was making a lot of noise in her room.
She's trying to learn how to play the bass for her band. Mallory went
downstairs so she could have work without so much racket. I bet she left
her stuff down there."

Skippy followed Mrs. Keaton to the basement door under the stairs, trying
again not to stare at her butt cheeks swelling out of her shorts. He
followed her down the stairs to the basement. It was a simple, unfinished
basement with a concrete floor. A few shelves filled with a variety of
random junk were pushed against the walls, along with a small refrigerator.
A poker table was set up in the middle of the room with some folding chairs
around it. An overhead light hung from a chain over the table. At one end
of the table was a stack of books and a messy pile of papers.

"I guess that's the stuff," said Skippy, scooping up the books and papers
from the table. "Thanks for your help, Mrs. Keaton."

"Anytime Skip, just don't do all the work for her. You can guide her, but
make her do her own work."

"I will, Mrs. Keaton," said Skippy as they went back up the stairs, "I'm K, do you have a key for this door?"

"A key? No it's not locked, just turn the knob."

Elise took the doorknob and turned it. It was locked. She jiggled it and it
was still locked.

"Oops," said Elise, "I think we're locked in."

They slowly went back down the steps.

"When will everyone else be home?" Asked Skippy..

"Probably not until tonight sometime."


"Yeah, well it's not that bad. Alex keeps some snacks in the fridge for his
poker games, so we can eat. We have camping equipment down here too, with air
mattresses and sleeping bags.. There's a sink in the corner for water. We
won't die."

Skippy opened the refrigerator.

"Hey, there's beer in here ," he said, "and cold pizza."

"Give me some of that beer," said Elise. "We're gonna be down here for a
while, we might as well do something fun."

Skippy handed her a cold bottle of beer and then grabbed another one for
himself. He sat down at the card table and Elise sat down across from him.

"Wanna play cards?" she asked him, picking up a deck.

"Sure, why not."

They played cards for a while and they drank beer. They played Go Fish, they
played Crazy Eights, they played War. They were having fun and they started
to get a little buzzed after a couple more beers.

"Gin!" said Elise, slamming down her hand after about an hour. "I need
another beer and I need to...oh shit1"

"What?" said Skippy.

"I need to go to the bathroom," Elise said wryly, "one thing we don't have
down here is a head..I'm going to have to figure out something to do."

"What about the sink?" asked Skippy.

"Maybe that would work for you but I think it would be a little awkward for

"Oh, yeah, of course. I'm an idiot."

"You're not an idiot, don't be silly," smiled Elise. "I think I have another
idea. Help me move this table."

Skippy helped her to slide the table to one side and they uncovered a grated
floor drain in the middle of the concrete floor..

"Great," said Elise. "I'll pee in the drain. Go get me a beer."

Skippy went and fetched her the beer. She took a swig and then said, "You go

"Huh?" said Skippy, confused.

"Pee in the drain. Come on, I don't have all day."


"Why? Because if I'm going to take down my panties and pee on the floor in
front of my teenaged next door neighbor, I'm going to make sure that he has
to do it too. So let's go. Get that thing out and start pissing.."

Stunned, Skippy uncertainly unzipped his trousers and reached into his fly.

"Move it," snapped Elise, "If you don't take it out I will."

Skippy sheepishly fished out his penis and Elise's eyes grew wide.

"Why, Skippy," she said with a funny smile. "I had no idea you were so

"Please don't tease me Mrs. Keaton. I know it's kind of big. It's really

"Oh, I'm not teasing a bit, and believe me, Mr. Mandelbaum, you've got
nothing to be embarrassed about."

"Well, thank you," Skippy said, blushing.

He urinated into the floor drain. It felt good. He had really needed to go,
himself, actually. It was good to get it out. It took a while.

"Damn," said Elise as he sighed and shook the last few drops out of his cock
before stuffing it back into his pants. "You're hung like a horse and you
piss like one too. Here, hold this."

She handed him her beer and then she undid her shorts.

"Here goes nothing," she said, and she casually slid them down, along with
her panties. Skippy was agape at the sight of her nudity. He didn't know what
to look at first, her bare behind, her thick, rectangular thatch of yellow
pubic hair or at the moist, pink cleft beneath it.

She squatted over the floor drain and asked Skippy for her beer back. He
handed it back to her, gawping openly at the furry, slit mound between her
legs. She nonchalantly took a swig of her beer and began to pee. Skippy
stared at the thick stream of yellow fluid arcing out from Mrs. Keaton's
thick lipped vulva.

"What's the matter, you've never seen a woman take a leak before?" asked
Elise, looking up at him with a sardonic smile.

", Mrs. Keaton, I haven't."

"Ever seen a woman's vagina before?"


"Magazines don't count."

"Oh. Well"

"Well, get a good look then," said Elise, "God knows when you'll get another

The stream of urine slowed to a trickle then stopped.

"Well, that's all she wrote," said Elise brightly, standing upright and
hauling up her shorts. "Let's play some more cards."

Then she looked down and saw the enormous protuberance in Skippy's khaki

"Wow, don't tell me that thing gets any bigger or I might just have to leave
Steven and marry you," she said with a grin."Hey, I've got an idea..Let's
play strip poker."

"Huh? Really?

"Sure, why not? We've already seen the good stuff anyway. Get me another

Skippy got the beer and nervously sat at the table while Mrs. Keaton shuffled
the cards.

"Here, have a cigar," she said opening a box on the table. Alex keeps them
for his poker games.

"No thanks, Mrs. Keaton."

"Suit yourself, then. I'm going to have one."

He lost the first three hands and he removed his shoes and on of his socks.
Elise lost the fourth hand and she removed her T-shirt, revealing her naked

"Wouldn't you rather take off your shoes? Asked Skippy, gazing, mesmerized at
her huge, pink areolas.

"Hey, would you rather look at my tits or my feet?" asked Elise.

"Um...tits." said Skippy.

Skippy lost again...and again...and again. He lost his other sock, his
own shirt and his pants. He was down to only his underwear, which now was
severely tented by his raging erection. Mrs Keaton was leaning forward in
her chair, still topless, puffing on her cigar. Skippy could not take his
eyes off her long, thick nipples. He couldn't concentrate on the game.

Mrs. Keaton lost a hand and shucked off her shorts, taking her underwear
with them.

"You only have to take off one thing," said Skippy.

"Are you complaining?"


Skippy had no concentration left at all, now. Mrs. Keaton was leaning way
back in her chair, naked except for her sneakers, her legs wide apart,
making sure that he could see the fleshy, fur-lined crease of her cunt. He
lost, of course, and grudgingly peeled off his briefs. His dick stood up
like a flagpole.

"My god, you've got a magnificent cock," said Elise with a funny grin again.
"Mallory doesn't know what she's turning down."

"Um...thanks, Mrs. Keaton. You've got a"

"You're damn right I do," said Elise, draining another bottle of beer. "I
have to pee again. Wanna watch?"


Elise got up from her chair and went once again to the floor drain. She
squatted and peed and and looked with amusement at Skippy's twitching

"Damn, that thing looks like a baseball bat. Has Mallory ever seen that
thing? I bet she hasn't or she'd be your girlfriend."

"No, Mrs. Keaton. Mallory's never seen it but..."

"But what?"

"I better not say. I don't want Mal to get in trouble."

"Don't worry about it. I promise that nothing you say will be used against
Mallory. Now what do you want to tell me?"

She finished pissing and stood back up.

"Um...well...Mallory said she would...if I did her paper for her, she

"She would what?"

"Give me a handjob"

Elise broke up laughing.

"I don't think she knew what she was letting herself in for. Is she at least
going to get naked for you?"

"It depends on the grade. If she gets a B she said she'll take off her top.
If she gets an A she'll take off everything."

"Well, I hope she gets an A," giggled Elise.

"Me too." said Skippy.

"Come on," said Elise. "Help me get one of these air mattresses out. There's
a pump around here somewhere. Let's get on of those things blown up so we
have something comfortable to sit on."

Skippy helped her to drag a big blue air mattress from under a pile of
camping gear, and Elise, sitting bare-assed and cross-legged on the cold
cement floor inflated it with a hand pump.

"There, " she said when she was done. "Now get comfy and I'll go and get a
little surprise for you."

Skippy sat on the mattress and watched as Mrs. Keaton went to rummage around
in another pile of junk on a low shelf. She was bending over with her back to
him and he stared at her naked butt, and wished that he could go somewhere
and beat off. He was afraid that he would just spontaneously ejaculate if he
couldn't do something about his hard on. He had never been so excited in his
life. Elise found what she was looking for and walked back to the mattress
with a metal tackle box in her hands.

"This is Alex's secret box," she said, sitting down next to Skippy on the
mattress. "He keeps this padlock on it. He hides this key underneath that
shelf. He thinks nobody knows about it."

"What's inside it?" asked Skippy.

"I'll show you," said Elise.

She opened the padlock and removed it from the box. She flipped opened the
lid and began to remove the contents.

"Here's a little doobage," she said, removing a small baggie with several
pre-rolled joints in it. She handed it to Skippy.

"Fire one of those up for us, will you? There's a lighter in the baggie.

As Skippy put one of the joints in his mouth and attempted to light it, Elise
removed more items.

"Here's a letter from Ronald Reagan...a picture of Alex when he met George
Will...boring, boring...ah, here we go."

She held up a pair of blue, silk panties as Skippy took a drag on the joint
and started coughing. Elise took the doobie away from him and took a long hit
for herself.

"That's a pair of Mallory's underwear," said Elise, slowly exhaling. "He
stole them from the hamper in her room, the little perv." She tossed the
panties at Skippy.

"Well, now, this is new. These are mine."

Elise picked up another pair of lacy, pink panties. She sniffed at them.

"Yep, they're used. Little sicko."

She tossed her own undies at Skippy and took another hit off the joint. She
regarded him with amusement as he now held a pair of underwear in either
hand, his cock standing up like a barbershop pole.

"You can smell 'em if you want to." she said, smiling.

", that's ok."

"Suit yourself. Want to see some naked pictures of Mallory?"


"Yeah, really. Alex is quite the little pornographer. You're not the only one
who does papers for Mallory you know."

She took a thick manilla envelope out of the box.

"This is how she repays him. She lets him take pictures."

She opened the envelope and dumped out a pile of Polaroid photographs onto
the mattress. She picked them up and teased him with them one by one.

It was Mallory all right. Mallory standing in what looked like Alex's
bedroom. She was taking her clothes off. Unbuttoning her shirt, standing
in her bra, removing her bra, leaning topless against Alex's desk. Skippy
lingered over the sight of her perky, brown-nippled little tits.

"Look how stiff her nipples are," said Elise. "She was enjoying this, even
though she was probably complaining the whole time. Here, it gets better."

More pictures. Mallory unzipping her jeans...pushing them down...standing
in nothing but her panties...turning around, showing her pantied ass to the
camera...facing the camera again, pulling down the waistband of her panties
and exposing a thick, dark bush...pushing the panties down to her knees...
kicking them off...standing naked...sitting naked on Alex's desk with her
legs apart, showing a moist, red gash in a thicket of curly, black pubic
hair...leaning over the desk with her ass to the camera, her legs apart,
presenting a succulent, pink vulva just under the taught, tan globes of her
buttocks. Her lush mound of pubic hair enveloped her pussy and went all the
way up the crack of her ass to her almond shaped anus.

Skippy was mesmerized.

"You don't know which hole you want to stick it in first, do you?" taunted

Skippy shrugged.

"Come on, tell me," Elise persisted, "where would you put that monster



"Well, neither. I'd want to go down on her first."

"Ooh, good boy, good answer," laughed Elise.

They looked at more pictures.

"This set kept her out of summer school," said Elise. They shot these at the
lake last July."

It was Mallory on a rowboat in the middle of a lake. She was wearing a blue,
one-piece bathing suit. In one shot she was pulling aside the crotch band of
her bathing suit, showing her hairy beaver to the camera. In another shot she
had the top pulled down, flashing her tits. In a third shot she was totally
naked, lying on her back on the bottom of the row boat. Her legs were splayed
wide and she was playing with herself.

"That's a good one, isn't it?" said Elise. She's really getting off in that
picture too, I can tell. This posing naked for her brother really seems to
turn her on. She's just as much a horn dog as he is."

The next picture was Mallory in the woods. She was wearing hiking boots and
shorts and a flannel shirt. The photo had been taken from behind as she
walked along a trail. In the next shot she was squatting under a tree with
her shorts around her ankles. She was pissing on the ground and giving a
finger to the camera. In the next shot she was strolling along the trail
wearing nothing but her hiking boots.

"These next ones are of me," said Elise. "Sneaky little bastard. I had no

She handed him a shot of herself and woman with brown hair and large breasts
sunbathing topless on beach towels in the Keaton's backyard. They both wore
only sunglasses and bikini bottoms and they were sipping margaritas.

"That's Jill Taylor," said Elise, "a friend of mine. Nice tits, huh? I love
those long, brown nipples. Those pictures look like they were taken from up
in Jennifer's treehouse. We never knew the little perv was up there."

The next picture showed Mrs. Taylor, sitting up, peeling her bikini bottom
off, revealing an enormous brown muff. Then she was pulling Mrs. Keaton's
bikini bottom off. Elise was raising her butt off the towel to assist Mrs.

Then Mrs. Taylor had her head buried between Elise's thighs. Elise had her
hands in Jill Taylor's hair, grinding her pelvis against Jill's face.

"Hey," said Elise, shrugging wryly, "sometimes us housewives get bored. We
need to have a little fun.

The next picture showed Mrs. Taylor sitting astraddle Mrs. Keaton's face.
Elise was gobbling hungrily at Jill's furry cunt. Then they were sixty-nining
with Jill on top. Jill had her ass to the camera and Elise had her tongue in
Mrs. Taylor's asshole.

"This is...quite a collection of photographs," Skippy said as Elise stuffed
them all back into the envelope.

"It sure is," said Elise. "Would you like to do something about that?"

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"That poor cock of yours. If that thing gets any more swollen it's going to
split down the middle. You can jerk off if you want. I don't mind."

"Really? Well, I'd feel kind of awkward."

"Oh, don't be silly. I'll do it too if you want. Wanna watch me play with


Elise scooted back across the mattress to sit with her back to the wall with
her knees up and her legs wide apart. She rubbed the furry crease of her
pussy with one hand, gently massaging the soft pink flesh of her vulva.

"Come sit next to me," she said. Get a good luck and get yourself off."

Skippy scooted back next to her on her right. He took his towering pole in
his hand and slowly stroked it as he stared between Mrs. Keaton's legs. He
could smell the musky scent of her pussy now.

"I have an idea," Elise said coyly, "why don't we do each other? You do me
and I'll do you."

"Um...I don't know what to do."

"Don't worry, you'll do fine. Here..."

Elise took his hand and put it on her warm, damp pussy.

"Nice and soft, like this," she said, gently rubbing his fingers up and down
her swollen labia. . She showed him how to find her hooded clit and how to
tease it. Then she took his cock in her hand and gave it a squeeze.

"Mallory doesn't know what she's missing," said Elise.

She stroked his throbbing dong while he fingered her snatch. He was a natural
at it. Amazing even. He fucked two fingers in and out of her while he diddled
her clit with his thumb.

"Oh, shit!" Elise groaned, thrusting her hips in rhythm, "I'm gonna fucking
come already... unnhhh...."

She lifted her ass from the mattress and groaned with her

"Whew," she sighed a few minutes later, "you deserve more than a handjob
after that."

She fondled his enormous cock with one hand and caressed his heavy balls with
the other. She leaned over and whispered into his ear, "How about if I use my

"I'd rather use my mouth on you first," said Skippy.

"You're such a good boy" said Elise, as Skippy crawled head first between her
legs. He ate her pussy like he'd been doing it all his life. He licked in
long slow strokes from the top of her asshole to the middle of her honey
colored muff. He licked at the hollows of her thighs. He sucked her swollen,
slippery clit and made her squirm. He sucked her little pee hole. He tongue
fucked her cunt and she started making noises again, humping her pelvis
against his face. He licked up and down the crack of her ass. He separated
the soft, round cheeks of her ass and tongue fucked her asshole. She came
again, quivering and twitching as she did so.

"Oh my god, Skippy," Elise said panting. "How did you learn how to do all
that? I thought you'd never been with woman before."

"I watch a lot of porno," Skippy said, shrugging, "what else am I going to

"Well, you sure learned a lot," said Elise. "Would you like that blow job

"Not yet," said Skippy, getting up to his knees. He grabbed her thighs and
dragged her away from the wall. He raised her legs so that she was now on
her back with her ass in the air.

"First I'm gonna fuck you."

"Ooh, is the little boy next door going to fuck Mrs. Keaton?" Elise said
playfully, hooking her knees over his shoulders as pressed the swollen head
of his cock into the mouth of her warm, sloppy cunt.

"Ooohhh!" she said more loudly as he slid the length of his cock up inside
her creamy cooze.

"Yes, Mrs. Keaton, I am," said Skippy.

He fucked his long dick in and out of her, letting her dictate the rhythm,
quickening his pace when she asked him to, speeding up even more when she
began to hump her ass more urgently against him. He pounded her hard, his
balls slapped against her naked behind.

She came three times in quick succession, arching her back off the mattress
and crying out as she did so.

Skippy paused as her cunt clenched and spasmed on his cock. When she was
done, and she relaxed once again on the mattress, he withdrew his slimy,
glistening fuck pole from her cunt. He climbed and straddled her chest and
poked it in her face.

"I'll take that blow job now, Mrs. Keaton."

Elise took his cock in her hands and then into her mouth, she swirled her
hot tongue around his organ. She deep throated him while she fondled his

"I'm gonna come Mrs. Keaton, get ready."

Then her mouth was full of semen, hot thick gouts of jism hit the back of
her throat. She patiently drank his load, continuing to jerk him off and
suck him until he was done. She cleaned his cock and balls with her tongue.
He was still hard.

"Sometimes I have to come more than once before it goes back down," explained

"You shouldn't be watching porno movies, you should be making them," said
Elise, "Here..."

She pushed Skippy off her chest and then turned over and got up on all fours.

"See any thing you like?" she asked, wiggling her ass at him. "Pick a hole,
any hole."

Skippy knelt behind her. He bent to kiss her pussy from behind. He ran his
tongue up her crack to her anus, and then straightened back up and inserted
his cock into her cunt from behind.

"You sure do taste good down there, Mrs. Keaton," he said as he fucked her
doggy style.

"Thank you Skippy, your cock tastes great too. I liked it when you came in my
mouth. I enjoyed sucking it off for you."

"Even when I came in your mouth?"

"Especially when you came in my mouth."

"Thanks, Mrs. Keaton."

Skippy pulled his prick back out of her juicy pussy and poked it between her
buns. He pressed his swollen knob against her pink, puckered anus.

"Ooh," said Elise, "I had a feeling you were going to pick that hole. Imagine
that. Little Skippy Handelman is going to fuck Mrs. Keaton up the ass. Are
you sure you can fit that great big cock into my little tiny asshole?"

"I think so Mrs. Keaton," said Skippy.

He forced the mushroom head of his dick into her bunghole, eliciting a groan.
He eased his long, hard tool into her poop chute, all the way up to his nuts.

"Wow, I guess you did get it in there," said Elise, "that feels nice, now
lets's see what you can do with it."

He fucked her up the ass with an easy, measured gait. "Damn, you're good at
this," said Elise. I can't believe Mallory hasn't given you a tumble."

She humped her butt back against him, grunting and panting. Skippy pounded
away at her round behind. His balls smacked noisily against her pussy. She
was coming again, making funny gutteral noises in her throat.

"Come for me, Skippy," she whimpered. "Shoot that nasty stuff up my ass."

"Yes, Mrs. Keaton," said Skippy.

A few more strokes and he obliged her, pumping spurt after spurt of hot
ejaculate into her snug rectum. He collapsed on her back with his dick still
inside her. After a few minutes he pulled his dribbling dork from her bung
hole and rolled over, panting, onto his own back. Elise sighed happily and
got up off the mattress. She found a stack of napkins on a shelf near the
card table, and then went to wet some of them in the sink. She began to wipe
herself between her buttocks.

"You sure do come a lot for a boy your age," she smirked at him, mopping up
the semen which was dribbling from her anus. She dropped the soiled napkins
on the floor drain then walked over to the fridge to get them a couple of
fresh beers.

"Are you sure you've never done any of this before?" She asked, heading back
to the mattress with the beers. "I have a feeling that when Mallory gets a
look at that shlong of yours, you're going to be in for a much better time
than a hand....why, Skippy!"

Skippy, unbelievably, had another towering erection.

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Keaton. It just doesn't seem to want to go down today."

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Skippy. You're just excited because it's
your first time. Believe me, you're not going to get a lot of complaints from
the ladies."

She set down the beers and knelt on the mattress beside him. I think we
can take care of that thing," she said, crawling astraddle his face. She
slithered down his body and they eased into a slow sixty-nine. Skippy
leisurely ate her sloppy cunt while her hot mouth and swirling tongue
worked on his cock. They climaxed together, with Skippy's tongue buried
deep in Elise's quivering butt hole, her mouth sucking his twitching,
squirting cock like a Hoover vacuum cleaner.

"Whew," panted Elise a few minutes later as they lay side by side on the
mattress, "you should definitely try that tongue-in-the-asshole thing on
Mallory. You'll make her come her brains out. It sure does the trick for

"Do you really think she would let me?"

"I don't think she'd object. Actually, I wonder if you might just be too much
dick for one girl. You should really be doing two at a time. I might have to
give her a hand...why, Skippy, look at that. I do believe you're getting
another boner!"

To be continued...


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