Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters of Desperate Housewives. They
belong to Marc Cherry. I'm only borrowing them.
Desperately Seeking Susan Episode 18 (Ff,Fff,inc,anal,voy)
I love weddings - the romance, the flowers, the food, the blushing in
virginal white (poetic licence in most weddings I've been too). Oh and
there's usually lot of sex-starved guests wandering around just gagging for
a bit of action.
So when I woke up on Gabby and Edie's big-day I was damp with excitement.
Partially, it's true, because Mom had decided to use her finger as an alarm
clock, but mainly at the thought of the wedding cake Bree had made. We'd
all chipped into help - Bree was doing the catering, I was doing the
photography, Mom was a Matron of Honour (she wanted to be a bridesmaid, but
Edie said she was too old) and er, Danielle, had, er, not done much really
now I think about it (well she'd had sex with one of the brides last
weekend if that counts).
I looked at the silent alarm clock. It flashed 7am.
"Mom, urrrgh, ... Okay finish what you're doing," I conceded as Mom went
beneath the covers and expertly lapped at my pussy.
When her head re-emerged it was 7:30 - still early, but a more respectable
time to get up to prepare for a wedding.
I slipped on a robe and went down to prepare breakfast for the three of us
(Gabby had stayed the night - disappointingly in the spare room) and I felt
it would be a bad start to the day if one of the brides was rushed to
hospital after eating a waffle cooked by Mom.
I was just laying them out on the table, when there was a knock on the
door. It was Bree, who was already in her Maid of Honour dress and with her
hair immaculately styled. I have my suspicions that Bree doesn't often
sleep, but stays up all night like a vampire - except styling rather than
"Not dressed yet, Julie," she remarked as she came in. In the small leather
bag she was carrying I could make out the imprint of a long rod like
object. She pulled it out and brandished it in my face - it was a hair
styler. Okay I like kinky sex - but there was no way I was going to stuff
that up myself I told her.
"It's so I can do Gabby's hair," Bree informed me, "though I think your
Mom's better straight."
"Who's better straight?" Gabby came down the stairs dressed in a short
"Susan," replied Bree.
"Really," said Gabby, "I think since she came out she's been much more
Bree sighed and I fled to the kitchen. This sounded like too much like a
conversation with Danielle.
By the time I'd finished breakfast, had a shower, done my hair and got
dressed it was 8:30 (I had a long shower and a leisurely breakfast I
Picking up my expensive digital camera (my part-time porn career is a
godsend) I prowled upstairs planning to take some action shots of the bride
and Maids of Honours [Mom saw my manuscript at this point and has demanded
on pain of me going to bed on my own for the next fortnight I refer to them
as Bridesmaids from now on].
Gabby was still in her satin negligee but now had a mudpack on her face and
having her hair curled by Bree. I took up my camera, but the howls of
outrage from the Milfs persuaded me that discretion was the better part of
valour, so I went back downstairs and watched the National Geographic
Channel, until Danielle came to call for me.
We wandered along over to Edie and Gabby's place, where the guests were
already starting to congregate and took our places. Just before noon the
first of the brides hurried down the aisle to take her place at the front.
Edie was dressed in a smart pair of black suit, with a matching low cut
jacket. Albeit not as low cut as her shirt, which if it had one more button
undone would have seen her arrested for public nudity. A few minutes later,
Gabby exercising her right to be late, arrived. The music started and the
bride and her Matrons of Honour, er bridesmaids walked down between the
rows of seating.
Mom and Bree were wearing peach coloured satin dresses, which went too far
up on the chest to be considered sexy - though at the right angle I could
just about see their knees. Gabby had gone for a less traditional approach
to bridal wear, her dress barely reaching the top of her thighs and her
titties making a desperate attempt to escape. I wondered what she was
wearing that was blue - it wasn't her panties (which I hope were new) or
garter that was for sure. At least she was wearing a veil.
The service over I put my photography skills to work. First I took some
pictures of the two brides (not nearly as exciting as my last photo session
with them), then the brides with the bridesmaids , various friends, friends
with bridesmaids, bride with one bridesmaid, bridesmaid on her own etc,
Gradually the people drifted away until there was just Gabby, Mom and Bree
"One more picture," said Gabby, "but this time from behind."
I went round the back of them as instructed, and as I did so I noticed
three pairs of panties being taken off and thrown into the bushes. Then
they all bent over and lifted their dresses, allowing me the chance to show
my artistic side. Admiring it later I do have to admit I got the composition
* * *
The meal was exquisite, as you might expect when organised by Bree. If this
was a cookery site I'd go on about how creamy the soup was, the fresh bread
rolls, the thickness of the garlic sauce. but it isn't, so I won't.
After the dishes had been cleared away it was the speeches. I soon noticed
Mom, who was sitting at the top table, was trying to mouth a message to me
which I couldn't make out. I nudged Danielle, to see if she could
"I'm horny," Danielle replied.
"Well, we can hardly leave now. Can't you wait until later?"
"That's what your Mom's saying to you."
"Jeez, Danielle, couldn't you have just said so."
This conversation was conducted in whispers, after which we sat back and
sulked with each other until the speeches were finished.
Mom came up and slipped her arm round my waist, "I'm horny," she leant
quietly over my ear.
Luckily the food had given me an appetite so I guided her away from the
tables and into Edie and Gabby's house. I tweaked Mom's ass and led her
upstairs. I'm sure the brides wouldn't mind lending us a room. It was for a
good cause - Mom can get very grumpy if she doesn't get her pussy pampered.
I pushed Mom onto the bed and hoisted up her dress. She hadn't bothered to
replace her underwear and so I didn't have to waste time with removing
anything before I knelt between her legs.
Easing out my tongue I lightly licked at her soft flesh, hearing Mom softly
moan as my tongue threaded its away around her pussy lips. I massaged her
outside for a few more minutes, until I knew she was quivering in
Then I went in. Experience had shown me exactly where her clit was, but I
also knew that I could bring her to a better orgasm if I didn't just aim
for the spot, but carried on working up to it. So whilst I aimed a few jabs
at her bud I also made sure I explored the rest of her twat, cleaning away
her juice as it began to gurgle out.
Only when I knew that if I didn't act she have a lesser orgasm, did I hit
for the clit. Mom screamed in pleasure and my slurping couldn't keep pace
with the amount of girl-cum she was producing, soaking my face and sliding
down between her thighs.
I withdrew my head, "Feeling better?" I asked.
"Much better," Mom replied dreamily.
"My turn," I whipped off my panties and dropped them in my handbag (I've
been artistically throwing them away a lot and then forgetting about them -
I'm starting to have a serious underwear shortage).
I dropped onto the bed, beside Mom, who changed positions so that she was
over my twat. Then she went in eating me with gusto. As her tongue did her
magic I grabbed at the bedclothes tightly in a desperate attempt to
postpone the inevitable.
When I came it was worth it as my entire body seemed to haze into another
heavenly dimension. Letting go off the bedding I sat upright, my breath
coming in strangled sobs and grabbed Mom's head, keeping her in place.
When the second orgasm hit me I wasn't able to stop myself giving a shriek
of pleasure and I fell back, bouncing on the soft bed, as I gave myself a
few minutes to recover my senses.
Mom wiped her lips clean and gave me a peck on the cheek. "I better go down
and join the party."
"I'll be down in five minutes."
* * *
It was more like ten - that's how good it was. And I was still tingling.
The meal over people were congregating around, talking and relaxing,
waiting for the music to begin. I started to walk over towards Danielle,
who was engaged in an animated conversation with a big-titted redhead, when
Edie intercepted me.
"Hi, Julie," she said grabbing my arm to stop me escaping, "Have you met my
"Hiya," drawled her auntie, holding out her ringless hand to me, "charmed
She was, what is politely described as, pleasantly plump, with a low cut
dress through which I could admire titties which were as well proportioned
as the rest of her. Beneath her hat, her hair had once been black, but was
now rapidly fading to grey. I guessed she was in her early sixties.
I took her hand and kissed it lightly (I'd should never have watched
Cinderella last night) and she simpered at me, "I've heard sooo much about
Her accent came from so deep South that she probably John Wilkes Booth was
a true patriot, I could cope with that. Though from the look on her face
and the speed with which Edie left us alone I guessed a discussion on the
nineteenth century wasn't her main priority (which, is a bit of a shame - a
bit of the one-two, followed by a discussion on history would have been my
perfect night in).
"Would you like a drink?" I offered politely whilst deftly purloining a
couple of glasses of orange juice from a passing waiter.
She took a sip from the glass, before putting it down on a neighbouring
table, "I'd like something stronger, she said and pulled out a silver flask
from her bag. She poured an indecently large measure into her orange. I
declined her offer of a top-up for me - I'd already had two glasses of
champagne during dinner.
"Cheers," she said and lifted her glass.
"Cheers," I replied and noted that her spare hand had planted itself on my
Meredith guided me away from the throng of people towards a quieter part of
the garden, "So is true?" she asked.
"What?" the movements of her hand suggested that it wasn't an innocent
accident it ended where it was.
"That you're the best fuck on Wisteria Lane?"
This a hard one to answer. Saying `yes' sounds like I'm boasting, saying
`no' might lead the Gilf wandering off to find out who was (personally my
money's on Bree).
I gave myself a chance to think by giving an inane giggle, which made
Meredith look at me strangely, before coming up with a less than original
answer, "Why don't you find out?"
I removed her hand from my butt and led her upstairs to the room where I
had my assignment with Mom shortly before.
The door had barely closed before her painted lips were locked against
mine. I opened my mouth and slipped my tongue into hers - whilst at the
same time I gripped her large butt cheeks hard. I could feel her hands at
the zip of my dress, pulling it down. I waited until it was fully undone
and then broke the kiss to slip out of it, standing naked in my high heels.
Meredith stared at my nude body and I could see that she was impressed. I
allowed her to savour it for a few moments, before I returned to help her
out of her dress. She wasn't wearing a bra and her bosoms exposed from the
dress were even larger than I dared imagine, flopping down onto her chest.
I swiftly removed her panties to expose a snatch with the just the faintest
trace of public hair, tastefully cut.
I began to feast on her baps, slobbering at them intently, one at a time.
Meredith gave a squeal of "mercy me," as I bit lightly at her expanded
nipples, running the tip of my tongue over the nub.
I had a reputation to maintain, so I let go off the big babies and went
down below intent on giving her the best munch of her life.
I gave her the full Julie Mayer special, just to make the climax all the
more special. Judging from the way she thrust my head at her chat, her
cries of pleasure and the juice covering my face I'd succeeded. I carried
on eating her through her first orgasm and waited until she was screaming
and bucking again before I pulled my head free.
I bounced onto the bed and waited for her to recover. Joining me she began
to run her fingers over my cunt lips.
"Whow," she exclaimed, "Edie was right."
One of her fingers slipped into my twat, and I groaned in pleasure as she
began to wiggle it.
"That's right," I gripped her wrist lightly as she found the right spot.
She slid her finger round my clit, gathering speed as I could feel myself
going into a sexual frenzy, until I gave a gasp.
Meredith pulled out her finger and I licked it clean of my own cum.
After I sucked away all my juice, Meredith stood up, "Stay put a minute,"
she said to me as she pulled a suitcase out from under the bed (I now know
who's guest room I'd been using earlier). I watched with interest as she
pulled out a double-ended dildo and waved it at me.
"Enough foreplay," she said and I agreed.
I lay fully down on the bed and pulled apart my lips. Meredith put one end
of the cock in my damp slit, and waggled it lubricating me even more. I
held up the other end as she crouched over me. Then she lowered herself
down as I guided it into her pussy.
As her full weight came down on me I gasped, partially because she knocked
more oxygen out of my lungs than I was prepared for, but mainly because the
cock rocketed against my clit like a crash test dummy hitting a wall.
Meredith rose again, and then slammed down. I was better prepared breathing
wise and the cry I gave was purely of enjoyment.
Meredith continued to ratchet herself up and down. She may have been old,
but she didn't lack in stamina. And with the pussy pummelling she was
giving me I was soon shrieking with orgasmic lust. Thankfully, she ignored
my cries and continue to push down.
Getting into the rhythm I thrust up to meet her, before my butt cheeks
would be hammered back into the bedclothes as she came down.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Meredith cried and I couldn't have agreed more as she
gave me the benefits of her experience.
All great things come to end, and finally an exhausted Meredith gave one
final passionate cry, before falling across me. I licked at her titties for
a few minutes, and with one of my hands reached down to finger her sodden
cunt. She gave a few moans, which got louder as I frigged her into one
final shout of joy. Then I pulled myself out from under her.
"If you ever fancy coming to Kansas." she said and we exchanged telephone
* * *
I had just finishing straightening my dress, when Danielle burst in.
Tactfully she ignored the snoozing woman on the bed. Instead she grabbed my
hand and said accusingly, "I've been looking for you."
I allowed her to drag me out and down the landing towards the main room,
explaining as she did so, "Gabby's offering us a chance to double team
"It's her wedding day," I said, "what about Edie?"
Danielle gave me a looking of exasperation, "She'll be taking the photo's
"But I'm the official photographer," I exclaimed. Though my protests were
cut shot as Danielle opened the bedroom door and thrust me in.
Edie was taking photos of Gabby, in her wedding dress, sitting on the bed.
She wasn't fully clothed, as she was busy pushing a dildo in and out of her
twat, though I noticed her wedding dress and garter were still on.
"At last," said Edie, "we had to start without you."
I blushed and mumbled apologies, about being unexpectedly engaged (which
was Edie's fault - she introduced me to her aunt).
"Never mind," said Edie, "if you want to get undressed there's some strap-
ons sitting on the cupboard if you want to give Gabby her present"
Strictly speaking the set of crystal decanters was a gift from Mom and I,
so they had a bit of a nerve asking for an extra present. That said
"Quidquid id est, timeo Danaos et dona ferentes" [normally translated as
`Beware of Greeks bearing gifts', but more accurately "Whatever it is, I
fear the Greeks, even bearing gifts."] is a stupid saying,
I joined Danielle, who was already, slipping out of her dress, though
unlike me she also had underwear to divest. Edie started taking pictures of
the two of us as we pranced over to the cupboard and then slipped the toys
into position. Gabby had moved to her hands and knees, taking first
Danielle's dildo in her mouth and then mind.
With two cocks stuffed down her mouth Gabby wasn't able to speak, but with
exaggerated eye movements she indicated that she wanted Danielle below her
in the pussy and mean above her, using the other hole. Satisfied the cocks
were wet she spat them out.
A nude Danielle slid beneath Gabby, and as Edie continued to click away I
helped guide the dildo up Gabby's pussy. That done I stood back and allowed
Gabby a few minutes of just riding Danielle whilst her wife continued to
take intimate pictures. I could see why they wanted some souvenirs as I
stared at the two of them, Gabby's dress made her look like a fairy-tale
princess riding a naked, er peasant (sorry Danielle, I couldn't think of a
"Uuuurrr, aaarrrggghhh," Gabby moaned, "Julie, don't just stand there."
I shook myself from the reverie and climbed onto the bed. Gabby and
Danielle stopped their bucking long enough to climb aboard. Gripping her
ass cheeks apart I slid the cock down Gabby's back passage and then started
to slide back and forth.
Danielle returned to her upwards pumping and Gabby squeaked as we
sandwiched her between us. Gripping her waist I ploughed into her ass, soon
Danielle's hands were up rubbing and holding onto mine. Between us we kept
Gabby firmly in place, though I suspect that she didn't want to leave
Even though I was concentrating on Gabby I could see Edie darting around
taking pictures, including a few very close-ups of the dildo jamming up her
wife's ass. Then she was obviously content she had enough pictures for the
album. Slipping out of her trousers she lowered herself onto Danielle's
face and started to kiss Gabby passionately.
This stifled Gabby's cries, but she redoubled her thrusting (partially
because Danielle had slowed and was concentrating on cleaning Edie's slit).
Moving my hand from her side, I slipped it down below and competed with the
strap-on in her pussy, luckily the fucking she'd been getting had left her
stretched and it was easy to slip the finger, without getting a friction
This new sensation caused Gabby almost to explode and she broke from her
lip lock with Edie to allow her feelings of enjoyment to be heard. Then she
gave a final shriek and fell forward, her bridal dress spread over
My friend finished the Milf lying on top of her and Edie gave a cry of
satisfaction as Danielle licked her dry.
Edie pilled on her trousers, then held out her hand to her panting wife.
"We better go and see the rest of our guests," she said and the two of them
left hand in hand.
I lay on top of Danielle as we both recovered (or I recovered - the only
exercise Danielle had been doing for the last ten minutes involved her
"Friends again," she asked.
"Friends again," I agreed.
_ _ _
If you have any comments on this or any other of my stories, e-mail me at
lipsticklesbian72 at lycos.com
Feel free to do the say if you have any suggestions for the future adventures
of Julie and friends. I can't promise I'll use them, but if I can I'll try
and craft a story round them.