Disclaimer: Beetlejuice belongs to Warner Brothers and Geffin Pictures. This
story is not-for-profit but I own it.
Warnings: Strong language, voyurism, female solo sex, male solo sex, BDSM,
male/female sex, female/female sex
Categories: Het, slash, bi
Feedback: Yes, I want feedback.
Other Notes: This story is a birthday gift for Geena Davis -- who was born on
January 21st, 1956 -- and takes place after the movie.
Summary: Barbara describes what happens to her after Lydia comes home with a
young and handsome blonde hunk.
Dedication: Happy 52nd Birthday to Geena Davis! -- ATK 2008
Beetlejuice: In The Maitland House
by Andrew Troy Keller ([email protected])
My name is Barbara Maitland and at first, my own beloved husband Adam and I
were about to start enjoying our vacation inside our own house within a small
town of Winter River, Conneticut but that was before a small dog had placed
itself in our path on our way home from a little unscheduled errend to the
hardware store and caused the both of us to crash through one side of the
Winter River Bridge and right down into that very river itself.
And of course, that was before both Adam and I had finally returned to our
house and discovered that a warm crackling fire was already burning in the
fireplace and a book entitled 'The Handbook For The Recently Deceased' on the
coffee table, which had suddenly caused the both of us to realize that we had
actually not been able to survive that accident. In short, both Adam and I
are D-E-A-D -- dead and at first, we had figured that we were going to have
nothing else to worry about but that was before my own sister had sold our
house to a Mister Charles Deetz, who had allowed himself to move right in
with his wife Delia -- who had hated how we had fixed up our own home -- and
his daughter Lydia, who had been -- at first -- feeling like the entire world
is one big dark room and I personally believe that it might had something to
do with the fact that Delia is actualy her stepmother and something really
bad had happened to her birth mother.
Anyway, as soon as Delia's old friend whose only name was Otho had also
arrived and decided to start detroying our nice normal home with her, both
Adam and I had decided to give scaring the entire Deetz family out of our
house a try, only to have us discover that no matter how hard we had tried,
Charles, Delia and Otho were unable to see us and the reason for that was
that we had discovered from both Juno, our Netherworld caseworker and Lydia
that some of those living within the mortal realm had allowed themselves to
igonre the strange and unusual.
And of course, that had caused both me and Adam to have no choice but to
ignore Juno's warning and give a call to her former assistant, a gross-out
bum of a ghost known as Beetlejuice -- which was actually pronounced
Betelgeuse -- three times and let that so-called freelance bio-exorcist do
the job of trying to scare the Deetz family out of the house, only to have
us discover that he had plans of his own and those plans had involved poor
sweet little Lydia, who I had just saved from Beetlejuice by saying his
name three times and causing him to zip himself back into the model of our
town that Adam was working on before our tragic accident.
And after we had noticed that a devilishly gleefull Beetlejuice was strolling
his way over to a whorehouse that Juno had placed in the model and found
ourselves inside her office, she had looked at both me and Adam with angry
eyes and blamed us for allowing the rest of the Deetz family to get a look at
the photos that Lydia had recently took of us and Otho to steal our copy of
And even though she had told us to try harder with scaring the Deetz family
out of the house and retrieve the photos and handbook, both Adam and I had
talked it over and decided to let Lydia and her family stay in the house with
us but that was before Charles had decided to make a real estate deal with
his business partner, Maxie Dean and his wife, Sarah and allow Otho to
perform an exorcisim with the handbook, which had nearly caused both me and
Adam to suffer through a second death if it were not for Lydia saying
Beetlejuice's name three times and allowing him to force the Deans out of the
house and release both me and Adam from our exorcisim trap.
But as soon as he had turned Otho's dark clothing into some tacy number and
caused him to run out of the house and screaming his lungs out, that creepy
son-of-a-bitch had turned his eyes toward Lydia, transformed her own clothing
into a blood-red wedding dress and the dining room into a ghoulish version of
a chapel but thankfully enough, he was unable to marry Lydia and it was
because even though he had zapped Adam into the model and me over to the
planet Saturn, my own beloved husband had drove a red pickup truck off of the
model table and right into Beetlejuice's foot, causing him to release his
grip on the poor girl and allowing me to crash back into the house on a giant
Sandworm and force that piss-ant stink-bomb to haul his ass back into the
Netherworld where it belongs.
And of course, after we were all finally able to meet and decided to start
living in the same house together, we were all on our way to becoming one
big happy family without any problems from a certain bio-exorcist known as
Beetlejuice and had allowed ourselves to continue becoming one ever since
but what we had discovered is that even though Lydia now has a brighter
outlook on life, even poor Charles had just realized that he was unable to
stop her from growing-up and not be his sweet little angel forever.
And if you want to know what is it that I'm trying to get at, I guess that I
might as well go ahead and start telling you a story that had began on the
afternoon of January 18th, which was when Lydia had stepped into the house
with a young and handsome young man with blonde hair, looked around the
living room and called, "Hello! Is there anybody home?!" causing me to appear
behind Lydia, give her a gentle tap on her shoulder and softly say to her
that both Charles and Delia had gone out of town for some business trip and
Adam had gone into the Netherworld to help Juno with some shit, which had
meant that I was going to be in charge.
But as soon as she had walked herself over to Mister Jeff Cronenberg (which
happens to be his name), wrapped her arms around his waist and told him to
they had the entire house to themselves, they had looked and smiled at each
other and gave themselves a deep and passionate kiss on the lips, which had
suddenly caused me to start remembering the sexy and romantic times that
Adam and I had once shared before our untimely death and ask could it be
possible for anyone to experience hot and steamy sex after he or she is dead.
That had caused me to appear in Lydia's bedroom, clear my throat and talk
to her about the one subject that I had suddenly became curious about just
before she had rolled her eyes, placed her hand on the back of her head and
said, "You know, Barbara. I just actually happen to be asking myself that
exact same question and if you were to ask me, I do believe that there's one
sure-fire way to fnd out."
And so, after they had finished their dinner and cleaned their plates,
both Jeff and Lydia had walked up the stairs and into her bedroom, where
they had stripped off all of their clothes and stared at each other's
wonderfully-built bare-ass naked bodies just in time for her to start
pumping two of her fingers in and out of her hot, wet pussy and carressing
her own tits with the other hand and for him to begin stroking his stiff
cock right in front of her.
And after I had taken all of my clothes off, placed one of my hands on the
bedroom door and the other hand on my hot and steamy cunt, Lydia had allowed
Jeff to place his nude body on her bed, tied both of his wrists to the bed
frame and placed a blindfold over his eyes, causing a confused Jeff to turn
his head towards Lydia and say, "Okay, I'll bite. What's going on, Lydia?
What's with the whole bondage thing?"
And then, after she had placed her gentle hand on his forehead, gave him a
gentle kiss on the cheek and answered, "It's funny that you should ask, Jeff.
I have a friend who wants to share our fuck session with us and she doesn't
want to be seen by your eyes yet. Okay?" and he had nodded his head in
response to her question, I had stepped into the room and started stroking
Jeff's stone hard dick with one hand and licking on Lydia's hot, moist snatch
and carressing her firm breasts with the other hand.
Then, after she had placed her hands on my bare shoulders and said,
"Aaaahhhh, yeeeessss! That's it! Do it, Barbara! Touch me! Touch me there!
Suck my wet pussy dry! Aaaahhhh!" Lydia had placed Jeff's stiff cock inside
her cunt and I had allowed her to start licking on my pussy and carressing
my stiff mounds, causing me to suddenly realize that I was still able to
experience the one thing that I had never experienced as a ghost before,
which happens to be known as pure and untamed erotica and I was still able
to enjoy every minute of it.
And of course, that was before I had placed Jeff's stone hard dick inside my
snatch, he had started licking on Lydia's pussy and she had placed her hands
on my silky-smooth naked thighs and began sucking on my tits, which had
caused me to place my hands on Lydia's bare back and yell at the top of my
lungs, "AAAAHHHH, YES! THAT'S IT! DO IT, JEFF! DO IT, LYDIA! TOUCH ME! SUCK
MY TITS! FUCK THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF ME! MAKE ME WANNA CUM!
And then, after the three of us had started moving ourselves harder and
faster and our lovemaking has finally bought its own house within the
neighborhood, Jeff, Lydia and I had came and collapsed due to exhaustion
and fell asleep with our naked arms in a lover's embrace while everyone
else in the small town of Winter River had continued on doing their normal
Just then, on the very next day, Lydia had walked down the stairs and over
to the living room, where she had discovered that I had placed my bare-ass
naked body on the sofa and looked at the beautiful outside scene through the
window with a small smile on my face, which had caused her to place her hands
on my bare shoulders and her head against mine, take a deep breath and ask,
"Well, Barbara? Were Jeff and I able to help you find the answer to that
question?" before I had placed my gentle hand on top of Lydia's and answered,
"That and more, Lydia. That and more."